布里丹之驴's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked 31 Dec, 2019 @ 7:43pm

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked 1 Feb, 2020 @ 1:54pm

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked 1 Feb, 2020 @ 1:35pm

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked 2 Feb, 2020 @ 12:46pm

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

Unlocked 8 Feb, 2020 @ 1:52pm

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked 2 Feb, 2020 @ 1:45pm

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked 3 Feb, 2020 @ 12:35pm

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked 6 Feb, 2020 @ 11:52am

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked 7 Feb, 2020 @ 1:14pm

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked 8 Feb, 2020 @ 10:41am

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked 8 Feb, 2020 @ 2:43pm

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Unlocked 9 Feb, 2020 @ 1:57pm

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

Unlocked 9 Feb, 2020 @ 1:33pm

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked 8 Feb, 2020 @ 8:47am

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

Unlocked 6 Feb, 2020 @ 11:22am

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

Unlocked 7 Feb, 2020 @ 2:14pm

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

Unlocked 7 Feb, 2020 @ 1:13pm

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Unlocked 5 Feb, 2020 @ 2:50pm

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

Unlocked 7 Feb, 2020 @ 1:40pm

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

Unlocked 6 Feb, 2020 @ 11:03am

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked 31 Jan, 2020 @ 1:16pm

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked 7 Feb, 2020 @ 6:15am

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked 5 Feb, 2020 @ 2:48pm

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked 5 Feb, 2020 @ 2:44pm

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked 7 Feb, 2020 @ 2:23pm

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

Unlocked 9 Feb, 2020 @ 1:03pm

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Unlocked 2 Feb, 2020 @ 1:35pm

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked 6 Feb, 2020 @ 11:30am

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked 7 Feb, 2020 @ 6:36am

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked 31 Dec, 2019 @ 7:42pm

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Unlocked 8 Feb, 2020 @ 1:58pm

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

Unlocked 8 Feb, 2020 @ 2:54pm

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

Unlocked 7 Feb, 2020 @ 1:16pm

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked 31 Dec, 2019 @ 8:10pm

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked 3 Feb, 2020 @ 10:08am

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

Unlocked 5 Feb, 2020 @ 2:10pm

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked 31 Dec, 2019 @ 7:29pm

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked 5 Jul, 2020 @ 6:05am

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked 5 Aug, 2020 @ 9:34am

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

Unlocked 6 Feb, 2020 @ 11:18am

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

Unlocked 5 Feb, 2020 @ 3:50pm

Found 'em faster than GWB

Discovered the hidden Taliban base.

Unlocked 4 Feb, 2020 @ 11:11am

Gotta pay the Troll Toll

Found one of the hidden underground sewers.

Unlocked 4 Feb, 2020 @ 10:24am

Gary vs. The K. Man

Discovered the Gary vs. Krotchy arena during the Apocalypse.

Unlocked 8 Feb, 2020 @ 10:25am

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

Unlocked 9 Feb, 2020 @ 2:00pm

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Unlocked 5 Aug, 2020 @ 9:30am

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Unlocked 6 Aug, 2020 @ 11:32am

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Unlocked 8 Aug, 2020 @ 9:29am

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Unlocked 8 Aug, 2020 @ 1:42pm

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

Unlocked 9 Aug, 2020 @ 2:08pm

Ape Gape

Escaped the Animal Control Center with all monkeys alive.

Unlocked 3 Aug, 2020 @ 7:52am

PooMasher

Bought the toilet paper instead of stealing it.

Unlocked 5 Aug, 2020 @ 10:38am

Hobo Sexual

Collected money for charity without stealing from Zack Ward.

Unlocked 7 Aug, 2020 @ 11:50am

Ginger Mint

Killed Zack Ward.

Unlocked 7 Aug, 2020 @ 12:13pm

Ladies Love Cake

Defeated your hateful ex-wife with delicious cake.

Unlocked 8 Aug, 2020 @ 9:27am

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

Unlocked 9 Aug, 2020 @ 12:52pm

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.

Unlocked 7 Feb, 2020 @ 6:35am

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

Waited 13 real world years to see an in-game Easter egg. Thanks for sticking with us!

Unlocked 3 Feb, 2020 @ 11:12am

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

19 / 30

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

0 / 30

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

0 / 20

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

28 / 30

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

24 / 30