Recent reviews by Blast My Chai

I'm gonna talk about the story in broad strokes, so please be wary of spoilers. I also feel kinda bad about giving this a thumbs down, but this is a subjective review, so doing a "Thumbs Up" and then stating "I don't actually recommend playing this" would be kinda silly. So there.

This game just didn't land with me at all. Initially, I was thinking this might be a "Passion of Christ" kinda deal: Curly, giving up his body and all of his (and everyone else's!) future to remind the other crew members (who all, in some way, are somewhat bad at that "being a person" thing) of the beauty of life, so that they may face death with newfound fortitude, the joke here being that he was the one that doomed them in the first place. I think the notion of such a presumptuous, useless sacrifice is quite entertaining!
But, turns out, it's more of a "Huis Clos" kinda thing, in particular, that one line, you know the one: "L'enfer, c'est les autres", but not in a "Personal identity is always assailed through the eyes of other people" way, but in the more popular "People just kinda suck" way.
Everyone is horrible, but even so, I don't understand why the characters in this story act the way they do; its themes lean heavily into anxiety about the future and general existential malcontent, and it's made clear that all of the characters feel this in some way or another, but I don't think the events preceding the collision justify it in any way; the cause is entirely disproportionate to the effect, unless I missed something and/or am just really stupid.
It also felt to me like the game's indulging itself in lavish visual metaphors a bit too much towards the end. I did appreciate the "Miracle of Life" kinda thing. Big fan of those. Big fan of the soundscape, too! I highly suggest using headphones, should you decide to play this game.

Them trees be eating my ass dude

It is the year 2.3*10^10 AD, and mankind has successfully achieved global peace after abolishing its own intellect, the capacity for emotion, and - VERY based - biological sexes and the notion of gender (they did keep the tits though).
However, after billions of years of frolicking around in senseless stupor, the sun has entered its subgiant phase. Hilarity ensues.
Despite looking like something only a die-hard subculture ♥♥♥♥♥ could enjoy, this is in fact an excellent point of entry for anyone remotely interested in shmups. The game does a fantastic job through its game play to teach you to stay on the offensive and has a bunch of mechanics centered around rewarding aggressive strategies. It looks and sounds amazing, too. The max level point item is like, a huge skeleton encased in some kind of open shiny coffin. It's as big as like a quarter of the vertical screen size. That's awesome.
Regarding content warnings: There's a lot of gore, but it's really cool, in a very gross kind of way. Some enemies also have a pair (or more) of the aforementioned breasts. They usually shoot danmaku. Science really is terrific!

Vaseraga sex



Wait this ain't Google

As usual, thanks for the food.

昨日、近所の吉野家行ったんです。吉野家。
そしたらなんか人がめちゃくちゃいっぱいで座れないんです。
で、よく見たらなんか垂れ幕下がってて、１５０円引き、とか書いてあるんです。
もうね、アホかと。馬鹿かと。
お前らな、１５０円引き如きで普段来てない吉野家に来てんじゃねーよ、ボケが。
１５０円だよ、１５０円。
なんか親子連れとかもいるし。一家４人で吉野家か。おめでてーな。
よーしパパ特盛頼んじゃうぞー、とか言ってるの。もう見てらんない。
お前らな、１５０円やるからその席空けろと。
吉野家ってのはな、もっと殺伐としてるべきなんだよ。
Ｕの字テーブルの向かいに座った奴といつ喧嘩が始まってもおかしくない、
刺すか刺されるか、そんな雰囲気がいいんじゃねーか。女子供は、すっこんでろ。
で、やっと座れたかと思ったら、隣の奴が、大盛つゆだくで、とか言ってるんです。
そこでまたぶち切れですよ。
あのな、つゆだくなんてきょうび流行んねーんだよ。ボケが。
得意げな顔して何が、つゆだくで、だ。
お前は本当につゆだくを食いたいのかと問いたい。問い詰めたい。小１時間問い詰めたい。
お前、つゆだくって言いたいだけちゃうんかと。
吉野家通の俺から言わせてもらえば今、吉野家通の間での最新流行はやっぱり、
ねぎだく、これだね。
大盛りねぎだくギョク。これが通の頼み方。
ねぎだくってのはねぎが多めに入ってる。そん代わり肉が少なめ。これ。
で、それに大盛りギョク（玉子）。これ最強。
しかしこれを頼むと次から店員にマークされるという危険も伴う、諸刃の剣。
素人にはお薦め出来ない。
まあお前らド素人は、牛鮭定食でも食ってなさいってこった。

Gabriel sex
Wait this isn't Google

Awful game do not play

The best horror game of the last two decades and two years.

Like the first game, except better in every regard. Relatively complex, with a steep initial learning curve; the game is not afraid to break your ankles clean off. If a healthy dose of frustration doesn't discourage you - or if that's exactly what you're looking for - Nioh 2 offers several rewarding and perfectly intertwined mechanics to master, along with tons of content to show them off in. Really, the only issue I have with the game is that its performance on Steam Deck is currently rough as heck.