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If teacake has a million fans, then I am one of them. If teacake has ten fans, then I am one of them. If teacake has only one fan then that is me. If teacake has no fans, then that means I am no longer on earth. If the world is against teacake, then I am against the world.

Simping for teacake isn’t just a moment, it’s a lifestyle, a reason to breathe, an escape from this evil world filled with thieves. It’s art! the first gift you open on Xmas a hug from a loved one everything you’ve ever wanted everything you need!

GOBBLE🦃GOBBLE🦃🅱️ITCH🐕!!! It's 🦡SKANKS-GIVING😜!!! This 🙌2021🙌 you have my 💦SPERM-ission👍 to 🌸May-DEFLOWER🌸 this 🔗TIGHT ASS🔒 🅱️USSY 🍑 with that 🥒THICC🥒 Plymouth 🍆♥♥♥♥🍆 😩OHH YEAA😫 💦♥♥♥💦 in this 👌HOLE👌 like the 👨‍🌾Pilgrims 🗯️CAME🗯️ all over 🇺🇲Ameri-♥♥♥♥💁🏽‍♂️ in 16️⃣19️⃣ ⚠️WAIT⚠️ DADDY 🧔 I need some extra ☁️CREAM☁️ with my 🎃Pump-♥♥♥♥🥖 PIE 🥧 PLEASE 🥺! And don't 👉 forget ☝️ to STUFF🌶️ this 🦃TURKEY🐓 and ☄️SHOOT🔫 that HOT, THICC 🔥GRAVY🔥 😛AWH YEAH😛 I'm THIRSTY 🥵 for that 💧♥♥♥-berry🍒 sauce, and I'm ready 🤤 to 👅SUCK👅 that 🍗 drum-STICK dry🦴dry🦴DRY💀!! SEND 📩 this to 5 🖐️ of the THIRSTIEST 🚽 THOTTIES 😜 you're THANKFUL 🙏 for, or else you 🙅‍♂️WON'T🙅‍♀️ get your 🥔potat-HOLE⭕ 💥MASHED💥 this YEAR 😱

Happy COCKtober 🤪 it’s time to get spooky 👹 with your pookie 😏 yeah how about a trick AND a treat? 😲 on the 31st you better whip out that halloweener 😂 but be careful…don’t get ghosted! 👻😅

A girl.... AND a gamer? Whoa mama! Hummina hummina hummina bazooooooooing! eyes pop out AROOOOOOOOGA! jaw drops tongue rolls out WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF tongue bursts out of the mouth uncontrollably leaking face and everything in reach WURBLWUBRLBWURblrwurblwurlbrwubrlwburlwbruwrlblwublr tiny cupid shoots an arrow through heart Ahhhhhhhhhhh me lady... heart in the shape of a heart starts beating so hard you can see it through shirt ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum