This is not a test, this is your Emergency Broadcast System. Announcing the commencement of the annual purge sanctioned by the U.S. Government.

Weapons of class four and lower have been authorized for use during the purge. All other weapons are restricted.

Commencing at the siren, any and all crime (including m*****r) will be legal for 12 continuous hours.

Police, fire, and Emergency Medical services will be unavailable until tomorrow morning at 7:00 a.m. When the purge concludes.

Blessed be our new founding fathers and America... A nation reborn.

May God be with you all.