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Open console ~, click on the wife and type
GetRelationshipRank player
It should show 4.
If she is an active follower, must be disbanded first.
Here is a process of installing the mod anew: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tzNALTlPfVo
Common mistakes players make:
1) Not approaching the Lovers Stone
2) Having spouses in the follower mode
3) Not clicking at the NPC before altering relationship in the console
4) Having UFO installed
1) Read the part of the description "How to gain the ability". it will NOT work right away
2) The spouse must not follow you
https://www.tapatalk.com/groups/bbenlibrary/game-acts-like-it-39-s-starting-then-crashes-t52.html
So far, you are the only one who has this problem and the mod has nothing to do with Whiterun, whiterun areas, main gates or any kind of in-game geometry whatsoever.
help "Mara's Tears" 0
This will bring the book id
Then just use
player.additem MaraTearsID