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Anyway, thank you for posting this, it's very helpful!
Take a character with a gender of 5, 6, 7. They can date Yukio, since she has a 1 in the preference field for gender 5, which means it doesn't matter that she doesn't prefer the other two. However, the player couldn't date someone like Zander, who has no numbers in any of those three gender columns.
A higher number represents increased attraction, giving you faster relationship growth, but it means the same for your relationship in the end whether it's attraction 1 or 3.
If you don't want to deal with any of it, there's a mod on Nexus that makes everyone playersexual and dateable regardless of gender.