First of all - let me introduce myself: I am one of the greatest VRChat guiders out there, actually #1!.. That's all, i dont have any achievements in life, i dont even have a name.

Pros and cons:
Pros

• You will (probably) have a woman!
  
• You will (probably) have some simp friends!

Cons

• You will (probably) have to listen to a woman!
  
• No sane person will even bother to talk to you!
  
• Your only friends will be miserable simps!
  
• You will, most likely, become fat & want to create your own subreddit or become a mod on discord

Now that we've got all that clear - are you ready for the guide itself!? If so - go read it, it's not going anywhere you know?

General outline:
To start, lets just pretend that you already a simp. Now, ask yourself a question - are you happy with yourself? Are you happy with what u've become, with your happiness that's almost solidified all over your body? Of course, others may call it grease, but you know what it really is!
Now, for the best part - a woman! Can you imagine that? Simps have those! So will you (NOTE: only if you'll continue to read my guide).
That's basically it, simps are blessed beings with lots of money, women and a mansion somewhere in the woods, because they're so successful and happy! (NOTE: happiness not guaranteed)

Now for the guide itself, be sure to follow the steps properly!

Now that you have basic knowledge about simps - choose your path & difficulty that are listed in no particular order, be warned that choosing your own simp path is very important! Almost like choosing a class in an RPG![/b1]

Redditor (Easiest)

1. Join a random world, it really doesn't matter for you
   
2. Find anything that resembles a female, do(x)(x) her beforehand to make sure she's a virgin
   
3. Approach her, dont forget to put your best photo on your VRC+ plaque
   
4. Just invite her to your house, she's already yours
   
5. If she for some reason refuses - just promptly remind her that you have several posts with over 30k upvotes on reddit
   
6. Profit! You have a woman! Where's the simping part, you might ask? Duh, u're a redditor, women will simp for you!

Women are queens! (Easy)

1. Join a random world, preferably a bar like Black Cat
   
2. Find anything that resembles a female
   
3. Linger around & wait until there's an argument & she's a part of it
   
4. Run in and defend her using every method you can
   
5. Done! She's yours! Now that u've saved her she's obliged to become your woman! That's how it works, doesn't it?
   
6. Profit! You have a woman! Where's the simping part, you might ask? Duh, u're a redditor, women will simp for you!

Just a dating sim(p) (Medium)

1. Write "Google" in your search bar (make sure u're using chrome)
   
2. Now that u're on Google write "Japanese dating sims download free" in the search bar
   
3. Find a website with as many dating sim games as possible
   
4. Choose 10 of them according to your own preferences & 100% them.
   
5. Now that you have 100% real & legit dating experience - time to conquer a real woman!
   
6. Join a random world, preferably a bar
   
7. Make sure to wait a little so introduction event happens
   
8. Save before choosing what to say (so it's easier to 100% her route later on)
   
9. Just follow her route, that's all you need to do really.
   
10. That's it! You have a woma... Wait.. that's a simp guide... Well... Okay then, get back to #4 and make sure that every game you choose has an NTR tag
    
11. Congrats! You have a woman!

Fake Chad (Hard)

1. Go to youtube
   
2. Write "Andrew Tate" and watch at least 100 different shorts with him
   
3. After you've done #2 - write "How to become an alpha" in youtube search bar
   
4. Make sure that you watch at least 50 hours of alpha content
   
5. Combine all energies from the tate shorts & alpha advices vids with your personality
   
6. Now that u're an Alpha GigaChad True Primordial Golden Ancestor you can play VRChat
   
7. Join random world
   
8. Find the closest group and just start speaking to them
   
9. None of them will reject you, u're an alpha, everyone likes them
   
10. Wait until some random woman approaches and starts talking to you, they always do that (talking from personal experience)
    
11. Profit! You have a wo...
    
12. Oh, right, you dont actually know how to treat a woman, do you? None of these vids actually give any useful info on that... Well, dont worry! My guide is here to help you, as always!
    
13. Just treat her like a queen she is, make sure to always give her more money than she asks for, dont say anything when it's the 4th time this week she goes out with her friends, dont talk abot her male best friend and everything will be great!.. Oh, almost forgot, dont even try to ask who she's messaging at night!
    
14. Congrats! You have a woman now!

SIMP PATH: CONCLUSION

That's it! U've done it cap, u've become a simp! What else is there to wish for!? U're now #1 on the Forbes list, go conquer the universe for that alien bussy you will simp for!
If you have any questions you can ask them in the comments, if i deem them worthy - i will answer!

That's all! Thanks for reading! Dont forget to give me an award if u've liked the guide!

Just to make it clear - i need those awards to feed my wife, she's too picky and wont eat anything but steam points. And no, she's not fictional and i'm not just writing it to appeal to higher being that will grant me some steam rewards, i'm actually offended if you think that way!