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FLASH COOLING LIQUID

Manufacturing an explosive is a very simple task for an alchemist. Considering how easy it is for a rogue alchemist to declare "this world is my oyster and I'm gonna cook it", it's a frightening fact indeed that true fire suppressants are comparatively difficult to produce.

A common misconception regarding triplex bonds is that they are inherently explosive, filled with energy and far too dangerous for anything remotely safe. This is true in the case of a fire-to-fire triplex bond; the sudden, violent severing of an unstable bond often liberates free fire atoms at velocity -- and we all know what that means.

But most things that move are not hot; a rock that flies through the air is amazingly painful, but it is not hot. Water that falls with great energy is still quite cold, and especially when it evaporates. And cold air that moves violently is something anyone who has sat outside in the dead of winter knows all too well as a scourge of all things warm-blooded.

So why, then, did the alchemists of the past so insist on making weapons of death and destruction, as opposed to making life more bearable like all the other great inventions? If alchemy really was the science of controlling the workings of the natural world, then why can't the glyph of triplex bonding be more useful on a summer's day? How come it levels entire houses at the flick of a trigger and the zap of a cable, but it can't even carbonate and cool my drink the minute I open it?

...I'm getting side tracked.

This flash-cooling liquid is not a particularly good fire suppressant for home use; both air and water are surprisingly reactive substances when not stabilized properly. It is easily capable of quickly cooling down an entire room, or even freezing fruits and desserts so violently they shatter when used in excess, but the immense pressure and the great amount of liberated air and water make it both entirely unsuitable for putting out wood fires and unacceptable for use in the proximity of anything even remotely capable of tarnishing.

Used in smaller quantities, it can, indeed, chill a drink, or freeze ice cream -- as I initially suspected. The products of its "explosion" are safe enough to ingest or inhale in small quantities.

Speaking of explosions, maybe I'd ought to invent a bottle that isn't made from glass. Maybe a painkiller that doesn't make me loopy, too. It's tough for me to tweak my transmutation engines when my hands are wrapped in bandages and I feel like...

Ahem. I hope you enjoy my latest invention as much as I enjoyed coming up with it.