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PAIN INFLICTER 9000

What's that? You're struggling to kill something? Well, my dearest paying customer do I have the perfect product for you. Introducing, the PAIN INFLICTER 9000. Designed from the ground up to carry an eye-watering framerate-killing Geneva-convention-violating 60 cruise missiles, this affront to god will quickly and efficiently erase anything from the face of the earth with as little as a single button press. Neighbors giving you trouble? Give them a taste of their own medicine, provided their medicine is around 1000 KT of TNT. Tax evasion issues? Simply press the space bar and even the IRS will think twice before coming after you. All in all, the PIN-9 is the premier in complete and utter destruction. The PIN-9: "Point it at something and press space."