Finding a sip of confidence after so many years of playing, practicing, trying, you become arrogant towards others and again stumbling over failure, we again become weak and unsure, which drives us even deeper into chronic depression and hopelessness. And people who do not play so often or talents who never lose form and spirit, they become on a pedestal to which you strive, maybe it's just not yours? Or will I still have to go through ♥♥♥♥, depression, endless self-abuse in order to come to my ideal in my head? Or maybe the problem is in me in my head? Am I even a normal person?