Orson_2's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked 18 Nov, 2019 @ 1:19pm

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked 18 Nov, 2019 @ 1:13pm

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked 18 Nov, 2019 @ 2:09pm

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2019 @ 11:14am

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked 18 Nov, 2019 @ 1:37pm

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2019 @ 7:41am

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2019 @ 8:51am

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2019 @ 11:35am

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked 20 Nov, 2019 @ 3:34am

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked 27 May, 2020 @ 12:36pm

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Unlocked 29 Oct, 2020 @ 3:40pm

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked 12 Jun, 2021 @ 1:43pm

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

Unlocked 28 Oct, 2020 @ 1:26pm

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked 14 Apr, 2020 @ 7:07am

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

Unlocked 14 Apr, 2020 @ 7:49am

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked 10 Dec, 2019 @ 7:34am

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Unlocked 18 Nov, 2019 @ 1:56pm

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Unlocked 18 Nov, 2019 @ 1:20pm

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2019 @ 11:26am

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked 10 Dec, 2019 @ 7:32am

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2019 @ 11:49am

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

Unlocked 28 May, 2020 @ 12:17pm

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2019 @ 8:48am

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Unlocked 27 May, 2020 @ 12:11pm

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked 18 Nov, 2019 @ 1:36pm

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked 18 Nov, 2019 @ 1:42pm

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2019 @ 8:34am

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked 18 Nov, 2019 @ 12:50pm

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked 9 Dec, 2019 @ 12:51pm

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2019 @ 11:50am

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2019 @ 10:56am

Gotta pay the Troll Toll

Found one of the hidden underground sewers.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2019 @ 11:38am

John Rambo'd!

Made a very long killing spree.

Unlocked 19 Nov, 2019 @ 11:34am

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

Unlocked 29 Oct, 2020 @ 3:43pm

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Unlocked 21 Nov, 2019 @ 10:22am

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Unlocked 30 Oct, 2020 @ 2:36pm

Dick Message

Wasted no time with the Wise Wang.

Unlocked 21 Nov, 2019 @ 10:17am

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.

Unlocked 10 Dec, 2019 @ 7:59am

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

1 / 30

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

9 / 30

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

8 / 30

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

1 / 10

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

8 / 10

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

0 / 30

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

0 / 20

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

0 / 30

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

335 / 5,000

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

13 / 30