GunchPhysics
Gunch
 
 
what's cookin good lookin
Currently Offline
Life
You wake up after a few hours of rest, the setting sun peeking through the small window in your mother's basement. 7 PM, your WOW guild is usually active at this time. But, Azeroth is getting stale, mundane. After a quick 2-second wank to google images gifs of your favorite waifu, the cycle is too much to bear for another day. You decide to venture out for the first time in years, seeking something more exotic. You scour the internet's endless land of Eastern MMOs for the perfect fit, but something catches your attention: Dragon Nest, THE WORLD'S FASTEST ACTION MMO-RPG.

No hesitation, you download the launcher and have a speedy update because of your super epic 2 TB SSD. It looks like a virus, but you don't care. You are desperate, needing to escape the monotony of your daily life.

You log in, noticing that there is only one server, with a low population. The game must be dead. You choose to play as the kali because it is the class with the biggest boobs. The character customization seems lack luster, but at least there is a boob slider, right? I mean, every eastern MMO has a boob slider. No. No boob slider. You contemplate uninstalling the game, after all it's definitely going to be a piece of ♥♥♥♥, right? Oh, how right you were. But there is a reason you chose Dragon Nest - and a reason Dragon nest chose you.

Ever since playing the opening cutscene, your quality of life sky rocketed to such a high outlier you raised the UN human development index of the whole United States of America. It was only months later, upon reaching level 95, and crafting FDN weapons when you would realize that Dragon Nest wasn't the typical game, no it was a messiah from big sky daddy above. You, as a lifelong avid r/atheism redditor, experienced a spiritual awakening: Dragon Nest was Jesus, and you have a divine mission to initiate the second coming. Resurrection. The Rapture.

It's up to you (don't forget to touch little boys)
Comments
GunchPhysics 15 Aug, 2020 @ 11:01pm 
Ok chunk chan
Schlorp 27 Jul, 2020 @ 9:32pm 
pungus
Koob 24 Feb, 2020 @ 2:51pm 
a $ $
Koob 24 Feb, 2020 @ 2:50pm 
Bad ass
GunchPhysics 29 Oct, 2017 @ 11:59am 
I'm so cool I comment on my own profile.