- Not a furry
- Not a female
- Not a Discord mod (I'm admin :sunglasses:)
- Not gay
- Not 41 years old
- Not the father of 14 children
- Not wanted in 4 states (Ohio doesn't count)
- Not gay
- Not in the closet
- Not in any closets
- Not gay
- Not currently in a relationship with a girl from Kentucky
- Not 4' 3''
- Not dumb
- Not into any fetishes
- Not a weeb
- Not gay
- Not the owner of a 2005 Honda Civic
- Not preparing to go to court
- Not on any watchlists
- Not safe from the FBI
- help
- Not a avid Twilight reader
- Not an incel
- Not attracted to men
- Not the owner of a LoversLab account
- Not a Patreon sub of Nickcado Avacado
- Not from Germany
- Not a Nazi
- Not an abuser of Flintstones Gummies
- Not the son of a ♥♥♥♥♥
- Not an alcoholic
- Not hard
- Not gay
- Not a fan of Hazbin Hotel
- Not into futa
- Not currently being held for ransom by Los Zetas for $30,000
- Not a fan of Riley Reid
- Not in possession of anything illegal
- Not emo
- Not a skin cancer victim
- Not the mother of three children
- Not homosexual
- Not a femboy
- Not into them either
- Not sus
- Not huffing copium
- Not Russian
- Not
- Not a Bladee fan
- Not a virgin
- Not a terrorist
- Not addicted to goth girls
- Not lesbian
- Not very racist
- Not an avid lean drinker
- Not maidenless (I have many maidens unlike you)
- Not mad
- Not gay
- Not gaming on a mandarin orange
- Not a booboodafool
- Not too freaky
- Not a Drizzy stan
- Not in the need for a 7 foot goth muscle mommy
- Not a snow baby
- Not a blud
- Not a Fuhuhluhtoogan
- Not a rep 15 Peacekeeper

If you call me any of these things, you are wrong. Especially the gay part, if I mentioned it.