i was born in a cave in north korea i had to survive off of lemon squares thats right nothing but lemon squares it was horrible thousands of humming birds attacked me one night thats when i decided it was time for a showdown between me and the evil bird people known as the aztecs but in the end after killing every last one what was it worth i knew i would be punished by the god i worship known as billy mays and from that day forward i did not speak a word about krabby clumps super fun time bath house ever again.at this point in my life i learned that its not a good idea to raid a blue berry muffin factory without a butty watching my back if you go in there alone you may never come back. many years have gone by in my life i am about 11 years of age but in the 20 years i have lived nothing compared to the hardships of having to burn my cave down with a pair of socks.it was for the better no one could know about those dreadful birdpeople that i eliminated at the age of 4 and a halve.when i left my cave behind me i came to a town full of small hippos these disgusting creatures that inhabited the land must be destroyed for i wanted to live there and all they said is "take your filthy hands off me you damn dirty ape". these words that they spat in my face that fateful day made me rage with anger.... not that you can really rage with anything else but never the less it happened. i was currently living in a hole not far east of this diseased town known as britain only surviving on what was left of my lemon square stash from all those years before in more simpler times when i could scream spitefully at the birds that i once hated with all my heart but thats all behind me its time for the second showdown of my life the one were i fight for justice for the anarchy of this uncivil land must be wiped clean off the face of this damned planet. i knew i stood no chance if they could alert their sick leader known as trey white the living abomination. i had to do this at the dark of night i sneaked in the west entrance because i lived in the east side it took me a total of 2 days to even reach this entrance. little did i know trey white the king of the land liked to sleep in the street specifically right in front of the east entrance. he woke up in an instant and shreeked a devilish shreek that you imagine an old lady with a time bomb strapped to her chest would make. i rushed over to it and shoved a lemon square down its throut the tiny humans that lived in its stomach started crawling up my arm i immediately tore of my whole arm before they could get to my feet for my feet were the source of my power my god billy mays blessed them when i was 2. the lemon square took its affect and trey white turned into a hamster i crushed him as soon as he hit the floor with my large toe nail. by this time the whole town of hippo people noticed and created a mob headed straight for me. i threw my severed arm at them and when it landed in the center it exploded with a vast explosion radius every last one of them splatter on the walls around me i scooped up all the remains and ate it later as a victory feast. i owned that town me alone TO BE CONTINUED.... MAYBE.