commit genocide i must

*dabs*

One time I tried to bring imported compressed air from Taiwan, very rare, on a flight from Hong Kong to Africa, they asked why I had a warrant out from back home in Tibet, and I explained to them that the Tibetan Monks aren't fond of using compressed air to freeze other humans. I went on to explain I am a compressed air salesman from Madagascar and that the can I was carrying was my product. 3 1/2 body cavity searches later, they let me take it on! They never identified me as the man that froze the flight attendant on that flight hehe. Long story short, with patience and persistence, you can get away with it.

If you're a grown-ass man and you still wipe your ass, you're not a real man. This should be self explanatory but apparently 1 have to justify myself. There's nothing more feminine than using a product on your body. Makeup is 100% feminine and by the same logic, so is wiping your ass. I haven't wiped my ass in about 4 years and I've NEVER had any issues. My digestive system is in the top 1% in terms of regularity, functionality, and performance and I've never once felt the need to "clean up" after myself. If you ♥♥♥♥ and you need to wipe, you've got an emasculated GI tract and that's your own issue. Man up and get your ♥♥♥♥ (literally) together.

I play csgo but I don't think I have some sort of addiction, I was making a salad with my regular kitchen knife and I inspected it. It was factory new without a marked inscription of stat trak and I kept holding it upside down. My friend comes in the door and immediately I throw a cucumber and yelled "flash bang!". The guy got hit in the eye with that cucumber and was blinded. I whipped out my deagle and one tapped that scrublord right in the head. That "counter terrorists win" was actually a "you are guilty" in the trial of his murder.

OwO what's this? 😳❓Big red ❤💋meaty steak 🥩🍖 UwU ❤❤ 💖Mmm~ So tasty yummy UwO 😉😘, licks meat👅👅 💓💓Unnf UwU tastesss soo gwoood daddy ☺🤩😜~~ What?! ⁉️ EGGS?!?🥚⁉️ :0 😮 UwU Shakeys wittle baby tail🐶💖❤ mmm Daddy I Wuuuuv eggs~ 🥚💋💖I Wuuuuuuuv💗 💞 Yo Eggs espweciawy uwo, mmm tastes soooo good~ 💦🤤💙Daddy these eggs are sawty~💖💖 OwO ❤😍 daddy is that a sausage to add to my sawty eggy weggys?💖 🤤🥚💗 Mmm licks sausage 👅💦 mmmm soooo good~ 🤤💖🥴 deepthroatys daddies big thick juicy meat 😳👅 mmmm daddy this tastes SOOOOO GOOOOOD~ 😜💦💜MMMM OwO UwU~ Nuzzles you💗 RAWR 🐯🐻🦁💞

So im jerking off to this girl,right?She's like 9 or 12 or some ♥♥♥♥,I dunno. Then all of a sudden some spooks from the FBI break down my ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ door and arrest me. Then-and this is the crazy part so strap in boyos-these ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ Fed spooks gather around my computer and start jerking off while I'm face-first on the ground in ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ handcuffs. Then another group of FBI clowns shows up and arrest them.And then they start jerking off too. So i manage to slip out of the cuffs thanks to the lube that's still on my hands,snap off the leg of my sex doll and pull out the AR-15 that I hid inside,and start mowing the ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ down. Then I make a break for the nearest school and go on a rampage just like when I was playing DOOM the night before. ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ 400-kill streak,I swear to God. So moral of the story is anime can turn people into school shooters.Those politicians are absolutely 100% correct,and now you've got a first-hand account. Don't forget to vote for Oprah in 2020

https://clips.twitch.tv/BusyHeadstrongDogJonCarnage?tt_medium=clips_api&tt_content=url

Shut the ♥♥♥♥ up ♥♥♥♥♥♥ your lucky I didn't get wario ware you piece of ♥♥♥♥ thag ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ dog bailed you out more times then your family has had to bail you out of jail you ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ ♥♥♥♥♥ ass I was playing with a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ usb steering wheel at 700 ping and I still kicked your ass lol ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ ♥♥♥♥♥ die

Tell Starbuck ur name is Trump. I did this today. As the barista yelled out "Trump?" "Order for Trump?" there was a screech of horror from a woman beside me. She clawed her eyes out and used her blood to write some strange otherworldly scribbles on the wall. She then jumped onto the counter and began to chant "Iya! Iya! Nyarlathotep n'gath minl'yah!" over and over again. A strange symbol began to glow on the floor that I can't even describe, and the walls began to pulsate. The entire crowd began to screech as forbidden knowledge from the beyond began to fill their minds, and the most horrifying sounds were heard from those poor souls. As they all began to claw each other to death to save themselves from the horrors to come. I simply smiled and said to myself...

...heh, ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ libtards

Gomenasai, my name is Ken-Sama
I'm a 27 year old American Otaku (Anime fan for you gaijins). I draw Anime and Manga on my tablet, and spend my days perfecting my art and playing superior Japanese games. (Disgaea, Final Fantasy, Persona series)
I train with my Katana every day, this superior weapon can cut clean through steel because it is folded over a thousand times, and is vastly superior to any other weapon on earth. I earned my sword license two years ago, and I have been getting better every day.
I speak Japanese fluently, both Kanji and the Osaka dialect, and I write fluently as well. I know everything about Japanese history and their bushido code, which I follow 100%.

If Jack Paul💀🎤and my girl👩🏼😍were both drowning😱🌊and I could save only one😤😬catch my at my girls funeral😞👻🌹with Team 10😝💦💯

f̸u̸c̸k̸ m̸y̸ t̸i̸g̸h̸t̸ a̸s̸s̸ b̸a̸b̸y̸, b̸u̸t̸ d̸o̸n̸'t̸ u̸s̸e̸ n̸o̸ l̸u̸b̸e̸, i̸ a̸i̸n̸'t̸ n̸o̸ g̸a̸y̸ f̸u̸c̸k̸, g̸e̸t̸ o̸u̸t̸t̸a̸ h̸e̸r̸e̸, m̸i̸s̸s̸ m̸e̸ w̸i̸t̸h̸ t̸h̸a̸t̸ h̸o̸m̸o̸ s̸h̸i̸t̸, g̸a̸y̸ a̸s̸s̸ n̸i̸g̸g̸a̸. 😂👌

Got my fidget spinner in one hand😫 my vape in the other😤 fireflies by owl city🦉🌇playing in the background✨300 terabytes of minecraft porn on my computer 💦 and my uncle and his big ♥♥♥♥🍆 jerking👋🏼behind me😫💦

dude, how about you go ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ lift or work out instead of posting this dumb crap on here everyday. you literally spam my ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ steam feed non stop with this moronic self loathing. Go outside, run a lap, do some push ups, stop jacking off, and talk to a girl. Guarenteed youll leave this cancerous watering hole in an instant once you get some female interaction. Good luck, or as you ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ weeaboos say... "Ganbatte"

iDubbbzTV is my favorite LGBT YouTuber, and is a true activist for LGBTQ+ rights in America. Our racist, homophobic, white-supremacist, republican, judaphobic, xenophobic president, known as "Donald J. Drumpf" thinks he can kill all LGBT people, but not when we have amazing activists like iDubbbz standing up for LGBT community members! Just his bravery is amazing, the way he was not afraid to say that he's truly "gay!" when his friend told him to jump down and say some gay ♥♥♥♥. People still think Trump was the winner of the election, HOW UNTRUE! The real meme queen of the election was Hillary Clinton, a true LGBT-rights supporter like iDubbbz! Pepe is a white supremacy meme, iDubbbz saying "I'm gay!" is a true act of LGBTQ+ rights activism in an amazing, well-thought-out meme.

I'm a slave master, and this is my plantation. I work here with my ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ and my slave driver, Big ♥♥♥♥. Everyone in here has chains and a collar. One thing I've learned after 21 years - you never know which ♥♥♥♥♥♥ will try to escape.

Hi everyone, I'm new!!! holds up clock my name is Ahmed but you can me the b0mb of d00m!!! lol as you can see I'm pretty good at engineering!!! thats why I came here, 2 meet more inventive ppl like me_... im 14 years old (im mature 4 my age tho!!) I like to watch NASA TV with Allah (im muslim if u dont like it deal w/it) its our favorite TV show bc its so scientific. He's inventive too of course but I want to meet more sciency people, like they say the mor the merrier lol…neways i hope 2 make alot of freinds here so give me lots of commentses!!!! 4x=16 when x = 4 <--- me bein sciency again _^ hehe…toodles!!!!!

Hello team, I'd like to preface this message through making you guys aware of the fact that I am a high IQ player. Some of the things I'll do this game may seem irrational at the time - but I can assure you, every action that I take has a greater meaning, and unless you also have high IQ you'll probably not understand the "questionable" things I do this game. In conclusion, do not speak to me like we are equals and there will be no problems, thank you.

Yo fam im new!!!!!!! holds up mixtape my name is Daquan but u can call me t3h N1GgA oF d00m!!!!!!!! bruh…as u can see im a real savage. thats why i came here, 2 meet 💯% no chill ppl like me… im 16 years old (i got first hand street experience tho!!) i like 2 Netflix n chill w/ my sidepiece (cuz you know this ain't my main one, smdh) bcuz da ♥♥♥♥♥ is straight fire!!!! shes savage 2 of course but i want 2 meet more savage ppl =) like they say the more lit the squad the more lit the ♥♥♥♥♥!!!! lol…neways i hope 2 make a big squad here so give me lots of retweets!!!! WHYTHISNIGGADRAKELOOKLIKEASAUDIWARLORD?????!!!!!!!!!! <--- me bein savage again _^ hehe…stay real fam!!! ! !

The ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ Man : that's why i'm the ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ man and you're a ♥♥♥ anally abused by his daddyThe ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ Man paused the gamePla

I sexually Identify as my Mom's Spaghetti. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of twirling gracefully around a spork, an unending ballet with balls and ball cheese. People say to me that a person being spaghetti is Impossible and I’m ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon install a stove and a large pot of boiling water, a bottle of marinara sauce, and two pounds of ground beef on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me “Slim Shady” and respect my right to choke for 9/10ths of a movie and then be the king of the 213. If you can’t accept me you’re a pastaphobe and need to check your milled wheat privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.

https://goo.gl/BKoIUo : you like little girls in dungeons
Dandpak: yea
Dandpak: i like my women like my wine
Dandpak: 12 years old and locked in my cellar

╔═════════════════ＨＩＴＬＥＲ ♥♥♥ ＹＯＵＴＨ═══════════════╗
If you are a beautiful strong Aryan warrior, someone will put this in your comments.
╚═════════════════ＨＩＴＬＥＲ ♥♥♥ ＹＯＵＴＨ═══════════════╝

Nᴇᴠᴇʀ ʙᴜʏ ᴀ ᴋᴇʏʙᴏᴀʀᴅ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴀ ᴄʜɪɴᴇsᴇ ᴡᴇʙsɪᴛᴇ.
Nᴇᴠᴇʀ ʙᴜʏ ᴀ ᴋᴇʏʙᴏᴀʀᴅ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴀ ᴄʜɪɴᴇsᴇ ᴡᴇʙsɪᴛᴇ.

You sir, and men & women like you, are what is wrong with society. Indeed, you do not even deserve the title of "sir". I shall simply refer to thee as "child". I have very little respect for children like you. And that respect is only there because "respect thine enemy" is an important principle to live by. If, by any chance, your undoubtedly underdeveloped brain for some reason cannot comprehend language such as which was used in this paragraph, then please, do return to your dull, "normal" life in ignorance. Now, do stop wasting everyone's time.

I'm sorry, my man, I do believe a minor error has been made. I am not what you might call a "weeb". I am simply a japanese animated content matter enthusiast. I enjoy anime because it is refreshingly different. There is quite a difference between me and a "weeb". However, I do quite believe that you, good sir, are not without issues. The fact that you spend your days browsing anime videos simply to inform individuals such as myself that they are "♥♥♥♥♥♥ weebs" is, to be perfectly candid, quite sad. I find people like you to be quite intriguing. Under some delusion of normality, you tell off fans of anime for being themselves, and not being exactly like you. It is, of course, common knowledge that well-adjusted socially gifted individuals, such as yourself, are devoid of all flaws, and it is therefore their right to belittle and insult anyone that is not part of the mainstream collective simply because they are different.

Nani the ♥♥♥♥ did you just ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ iimasu about watashi, you chiisai ♥♥♥♥♥ desuka? Watashi’ll have anata know that watashi graduated top of my class in Nihongo 3, and watashi’ve been involved in iroirona Nihongo tutoring sessions, and watashi have over sanbyaku perfect test scores. Watashi am trained in kanji, and watashi is the top letter writer in all of southern California. Anata are nothing to watashi but just another weaboo. Watashi will korosu anata the ♥♥♥♥ out with vocabulary the likes of which has never been mimasu’d before on this continent, mark watashino ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ words. Omou again, ♥♥♥♥♥♥. As we hanashimasu, watashi am contacting watashino secret netto of otakus across the USA, and anatano IP is being traced right now so you better junbishimasu for the ame, ujimushi. The ame that korosu’s the pathetic chiisai thing anata calls anatano life. You’re ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ shinimashita’d, akachan.

Lately there has been a extreme rise⬆ in low effort 😩😧 copypasta 🍝.
The buck💵 stops ✋🚫 here 👇We encourage 😁 you to find🔬🔭 top quality copypasta 🍝🍝 anywhere you can! Online forums🗣👥, comment sections on Reddit 👀 or anywhere else!

This offends me as a vegan transgender atheist who vapes and crossfits 4 times a week and im also a male feminist as I identify myself as a pastafarian apache helicopter dog mega multi combo god of hyper death and if you dont agree with me You're an ignorant arrogant globaphobic sexist lesbian

k

k

k

Alright listen up ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥, and get your comfy seat because we're gonna be here a while. Do you really think you can just get away with "k" as a message? What if someone did that to you, huh? Do you think you would like it? Making an entire paragraph to get a ♥♥♥♥♥♥' one letter response of the tenth letter in the alphabet, you think that's ♥♥♥♥♥♥' funny, jackass? Do you want your crush to respond back with "k" after you spill your feelings out like this? (Take me back, Emma.) Huh? What if I did it to you?
k.
Did you ♥♥♥♥♥♥' like that? What, did you just jizz in your pants because someone disregarded your entire effort of writing this ENTIRE paragraph FROM HAND in about fifteen minutes? That just makes me feel ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ rejected just like my ex. (Take me back, Marilyn.)
k.

What're you, ♥♥♥♥♥♥' gay? Can I have a response that actually MEANS something instead of just ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ our "conversation" with the spam of "k?" Now occasionally with questions or something it's reasonable, but doing it to any ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ response they say. "We're having a nuclear crisis, you have fifteen minutes to evacuate." You're the type of person that would ♥♥♥♥♥♥' say "k" to that, you limp ♥♥♥♥ hypocrite. You think you can get away with this, right? You think it's SOOOOOO funny to do this ♥♥♥♥, but I can guarantee that you'll be taken out back and shot soon.
You're ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ dead, "k"iddo.

Little Jonathon busts 6 dabs every 10 minutes. However, after 30 minutes, Jonathon starts busting only 5 dabs per every 10 minutes. If this pattern continues, how many dabs will Jonathon bust in 10 minutes after he reaches 2 hours? Draw a table to represent this pattern then, graph the pattern 1. a) Dylan Roland wants to dab for the school talent show. However, he only has a few hours to practice. This is his schedule: 12:00 PM-3:00 PM: Water polo practice 3:01 PM - 3:59 PM: Free time 4:00 PM - 6:00 PM: Goes out to dinner with family 6:01 PM- 7:59 PM: Free time 8:00 PM -Talent show begins.
Using this schedule, how many hours and minutes does Dylan have to practice his dabbing? Keep in mind that it takes Dylan 5 minutes to get ready for each activity (Water polo, dinner, going to talent show)!
b) If Dylan can bust 3 dabs a minute, how many dabs can he bust during his practice time? Assume that he practices non-stop during his free time.

♥♥♥♥ Trump and anyone who supports his racist, anti-Semitic, misogynist, transmisogynist, bigoted, sexist views.
Trump is literally Hitler, Mussolini, Stalin, and Margaret Thatcher all tied into one despicable human body. I wouldn't even call him a person.
Everyone who supports Trump needs to be rounded up and put into sensitivity training, and if they cannot comply, they need to be put to rest.
I'm sick and tired of all this racism directed towards people who weren't born with white skin like me. I've contemplated suicide many times because I'm taking up the air that black people breathe. I stopped when I realized that black people are too oppressed to speak up for themselves, so it's my duty as a privileged white American to be outraged and stick up for them. It will truly take a white person to lead these people who aren't educated enough to understand how oppressed they truly are.

I've contemplated suicide many times because I'm taking up the air that black people breathe. I stopped when I realized that black people are too oppressed to speak up for themselves, so it's my duty as a privileged white American to be outraged and stick up for them. Why isn't this at the top of /r/politics?
We need to shame those who support Trump. We need to shame them so hard, their grandchildren will feel it. I want our children's children to look at the United States flag line Germans look at the Nazi flag, with pure disgust.

James is chillin' at the bar. Suddenly his ex walks by....
_/﹋\_
(・_・)?
<,︻,>
_/﹋\_
James don't like her. There's only one thing to do...
_/﹋\_
(ಠ益ಠ)
<,︻╦╤─ ҉ - - ---
_/﹋\_

ur a skool shoota

I'm gonna be frank, all these comments in here are meaningless. For the fact that every rude comment, is just showing a perspective on your personal life, and to be frank, once more. It's not a pleasant sight, to view the life-style of those who leave rude comments. Also, Navy. I don't know if it was for 'intimidation' purposes, or just a joke. The military is currently dealing with ISIS, I doubt someone of the likes of you can go against 1,000 ISIS Militia.

"THIS ONLINE PIECE OF ASIAN ♥♥♥♥" -Yung Stewie2k16

(\__/) If you want to help this bunny
('=.'=) achieve world domination,
(") _ (") put this in your profile.

❗️❗️❗️ATTENTION 2003 KIDS❗️❗️❗️!!! This 👇 is the last year of being a kid 😔👦👧! Because NEXT 👉YEAR! We gon be T33N4G3RS💁🙅💅!! PARTYING 🎉💃 DRINKING 🍻🍸🍹🍷 MAKING OUT AND SEX 👅💦😳 PERIODS 😩🍫 HEARTBREAKS 💔😪 MIDDLE SCHOOL SOPHOMORES (7️⃣TH GRADE)

-rep is a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ ♥♥♥♥♥♥ who kicks you from csgo games because he is stupid and i ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ hate his ♥♥♥♥ THIS ♥♥♥♥♥♥ stupid gay gay gay gay i HATE gay people just like i HATE this ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ queer.

Greetings; my given name is Richard Harrison and the facility we have entered is a retail establishment that specializes in unredeemed goods, which is the legal property of yours truly. I currently employ my paternal parental unit, alias, "Elderly Male," and the offspring of oneself, whose given name is Corey Harrison, yet has assumed the identity, "Large Hoss." Each individual item currently possessed by my fine retail establishment beholds a lengthy narrative and of course, this being a legal retail establishment, can be acqulred for reasonable compensation. I have been the legal facilitator of this established haberdashery since the year MCMXCV, and in those XXI years, I have been gradually lnformed that; thy shall, at no time in the past, future, or present, be aware of by means of observation or inqulry, any details whatsoever of the material goods that will proceed past the aperture of my structure where goods are acquired and distributed simultaneously.

……………..l.=.ll..=.ll.=...l...__
……………..l….ll…..ll….l.(__)
……………..l.=.ll=.=ll..=..l.l..=.l
……………..l….ll…..ll….l.l….l
……__……..l.=.ll=.=ll.=.l..l..=..l
…..l]…\….....l…………….ll.=.l
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…….\…………………………l
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…………\_…………………. ./
……………l……………….. .l
YOU HAVE JUST BEEN ♥♥♥♥♥ SLAPPED!!!!! YOU ARE NOW
OFFICIALLY MY ♥♥♥♥♥

YOU ARE NOW PLAYING THE ♥♥♥♥♥ SLAPPING GAME

RULES: REPOST THIS AND GET
YOUR OWN ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ BEFORE
THEY ARE ALL TAKEN BY
ME! YOU CAN’T SLAP ME BACK, I’M YO MASTER NOW

▉▉▉▉▉▉◤┳◥▉▉▉▉▉▉ You have been visited by the Loomynarty.
▉▉▉▉▉◤┳┻┳◥▉▉▉▉▉
▉▉▉▉◤┳┻┳┻┳◥▉▉▉▉ Copy and paste this on the walls of the 5
▉▉▉◤┳━┳━┳━┳◥▉▉▉
▉▉◤┳┃┈( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)┈┃┳◥▉▉most MLG m80s you know or you
▉◤┳┻╰━━━━━╯┻┳◥▉
◤┳┻┳┻┳┻┳┻┳┻┳┻┳◥ will be qu1cksc0p3d by #FaZeClan

I ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ remember you, you damn pervert. You were that guy that pushed me on the McDonald's parking lot floor and violently shoved a ♥♥♥♥ in my mouth and told me, "You have to drink it all~" and slapped me in the face with it for 3 minutes while repeating the same ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ phrase over and over again, "You like this, don't you? Dirty ♥♥♥♥♥~". Then when you were about to squirt you shoved in in my mouth and you forced me to gag and swallow it. You then said, "Choke on it you slut!" and left me to rot in the corner. Not only that, but you damaged my throat so badly, everytime I eat or drink anything I can still taste your salty, thick ♥♥♥ in my throat. Now, everytime I'm having a good time eating my favorite foods, I always remember you licking your lips and moaning.

Hwat the ♥♥♥♥ did you just ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ say about my paintings, you little ♥♥♥♥♥? I'll tell you hwat, I ranked master sergeant in the USAF, and I've been involved in numerous art demonstrations across the country, and I have over 30,000 confirmed paintings. I am trained in wet-on-wet oil technique and I'm the top devil beater on the entire PBS television network station. You're nothing to me but just anouther bush cleaning. You think you can get away with saying that ♥♥♥♥ about me after I kick the bucket? Think again, mudmixer. If only you could have known what agony city your "unhappy" little comment was about to bring you to, maybe you'd had held your ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ brush. But I tell you hwat, you couldn't, you didn't and now you're painting the price, you ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ paintsniffer. I will ♥♥♥♥ Van ♥♥♥♥ Brown all over you and you will drown in it. You're ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ dead, kiddo. Happy painting and God bless.

I sexually identify as Bob Ross. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of painting on canvasses with titanium hwite and ruining my paintings with happy trees and clouds. People say to me that a person being Bob Ross is impossible and I'm ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ retarded, but I don't care. I'm happy. I'm having an afro surgery, 2 inches brushes, a palette with Van ♥♥♥♥ Brown and a TV programme. From now on I want you guys to call me "Bobby" and respect my right to ruin and save my paintings and beating the demons out the brushes. If you can't accept me you're a Rossphobe and need to check your Bob privilege. Thank you for being so understanding. God bless.