Questionable Seal's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked 18 Apr, 2015 @ 1:18am

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked 20 Apr, 2015 @ 4:12am

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked 18 Apr, 2015 @ 1:09am

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Unlocked 28 Jul, 2015 @ 11:58pm

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2015 @ 4:49am

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2015 @ 5:16am

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked 18 Apr, 2015 @ 10:09pm

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked 24 Apr, 2015 @ 10:30pm

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked 25 Apr, 2015 @ 8:13pm

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked 25 Apr, 2015 @ 11:43pm

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked 30 Apr, 2015 @ 2:52am

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Unlocked 30 Apr, 2015 @ 6:32am

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

Unlocked 6 May, 2015 @ 6:08am

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked 20 Apr, 2015 @ 4:32am

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

Unlocked 29 Jul, 2015 @ 12:26am

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

Unlocked 28 Jun, 2017 @ 2:14am

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Unlocked 25 Apr, 2015 @ 7:41pm

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

Unlocked 24 Apr, 2015 @ 10:10pm

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked 18 Apr, 2015 @ 2:08am

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2015 @ 5:44am

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked 25 Apr, 2015 @ 9:59pm

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Unlocked 28 Jul, 2015 @ 11:52pm

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Unlocked 28 Jul, 2015 @ 8:17pm

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked 24 Apr, 2015 @ 10:30pm

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked 25 Apr, 2015 @ 9:26pm

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

Unlocked 25 Apr, 2015 @ 10:48pm

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

Unlocked 29 Jul, 2015 @ 12:14am

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked 25 Apr, 2015 @ 8:05pm

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

Unlocked 30 Apr, 2015 @ 2:56am

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Unlocked 8 Aug, 2015 @ 9:53pm

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Unlocked 28 Jul, 2015 @ 8:21pm

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked 20 Apr, 2015 @ 4:11am

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked 25 Apr, 2015 @ 7:16pm

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked 24 Apr, 2015 @ 9:42pm

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Unlocked 26 Jun, 2017 @ 2:11am

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Unlocked 22 Jul, 2015 @ 12:03am

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

Unlocked 25 Apr, 2015 @ 10:23pm

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

Unlocked 8 Aug, 2015 @ 6:57pm

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked 16 Apr, 2015 @ 4:48am

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked 18 Apr, 2015 @ 2:20am

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

Unlocked 18 Apr, 2015 @ 2:20am

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked 18 Apr, 2015 @ 1:15am

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked 18 Apr, 2015 @ 1:16am

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked 28 Jul, 2015 @ 11:00pm

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

Unlocked 18 Apr, 2015 @ 2:16am

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

Unlocked 30 Jul, 2015 @ 11:19pm

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

Unlocked 25 Apr, 2015 @ 10:23pm

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

Unlocked 28 Jul, 2015 @ 12:12am

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

Unlocked 25 Apr, 2015 @ 12:49am

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

Unlocked 28 Jul, 2015 @ 12:37am

There's always money in the banana stand

Found the secret bank exit on Monday.

Unlocked 6 May, 2015 @ 6:41am

Found 'em faster than GWB

Discovered the hidden Taliban base.

Unlocked 28 Aug, 2015 @ 7:51pm

Gotta pay the Troll Toll

Found one of the hidden underground sewers.

Unlocked 28 Jul, 2015 @ 12:11am

You are not alone

Observed an NPC going POSTAL!

Unlocked 6 May, 2015 @ 6:20am

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

Unlocked 30 Apr, 2015 @ 6:33am

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Unlocked 25 Jun, 2017 @ 5:25am

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Unlocked 26 Jun, 2017 @ 2:02am

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Unlocked 27 Jun, 2017 @ 3:38am

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Unlocked 29 Jun, 2017 @ 2:04am

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

Unlocked 30 Jun, 2017 @ 12:44am

Ginger Mint

Killed Zack Ward.

Unlocked 27 Jun, 2017 @ 2:48am

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

Unlocked 27 Jun, 2017 @ 4:21am

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.

Unlocked 27 Jun, 2017 @ 4:56am

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

6 / 30

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

1 / 10

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

1 / 20

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

19 / 30

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

29 / 30