"I wish there was a way to know you're in "the good old days", before you've actually left them."

"The worst thing about prison was the... was the Dementors. They... were flying all over the place, and they were scary. And they'd come down, and they'd suck the soul out of your body, and it hurt!" - Prison Mike

"Marriage is a lot like war. Don't let the Japanese get in the way" - Sal Vulcano's grandfather

"The best defense is not fighting at all" - Conan

"Well, well, well how the turn tables" - Michael Scott

"I protect that which cannot protect itself. But what protects me?" - Treant Protector