There's an emotional void, that you leave unacknowledged, a tax on your heart reducing your emotional wealth, a scorching of your soul.

You might wonder why I write my thoughts on this wall, thoughts interest & guide me, sharing them with you I suppose gives some validation to those thoughts & feelings, but I like to think friends are there to share in your opinions and in response tell you their views which sparks interesting conversations.

Depression isn't a disease, nor is it just simply a state of mind, one could call it a way of life.. That passion for crippling & dramatic sadness, something entrenched in your mind that if you desire it, you will fight with. In a more developed form, that flare for the dramatic makes us see things differently, the inner monologue in our brain amplifies the darkness & turns it into a beautiful black diamond, if you release a depressed heart, caged in the anxiety of acceptance, what would you see.. could you bear it.

I'm layin' here wondering where all of this starts & ends.. who it affected and what it achieves.. but really the answers don't matter, they're just thoughts that have no basis of reality.. the darkness of my mind won't settle but for a minute unless I find you..

However, what is it we strive for but to be part of the group, following a crowd into a solitude that puts you into the shadows. On the other hand, we could instead follow our interests and become independent, this would avoid a lot of boredom. Excluded by the group, I am at a loss of purpose and bearing.

Invited at my own volition I feel excluded, included I felt worth it, left to my own devices I felt used. Working in a team I would feel fulfilled.

A painful heart, that knows rejection, loneliness and sadness, is the most reliable heart you will ever set eyes on, the kindest people you will ever meet are deeply hurt inside, torn into a thousand pieces we become nothing just to stitch your heart so it wouldn't break