Good evening squire. My name is Martin, or as they call me on Reddit wherein I am most well renowned, u/LinkinParkiplier96. I am the bearer of many talents, such as a keen sense of fashion. I often peruse downtown with my great grandfather, aptly demonstrating my astute sense of altruism by means of liason and volunteering for the benefit of the elderly members of our fair city. Most denizens of our town would associate him among the finest upper-class of this fine place, but he shamelessly admits defeat to my infallible sense of classiness; often needing to drop current conversation entirely just to deliver a heartfelt sonnet to promote my superior eye for fashionable town hats and trench-coat winterwear. With this in mind, my fair maiden, would you not wish to drop all ties with your trilobite, low-intelligence, failed man-child of a 'partner'? Would you not wish to be complemented by a sir to Broadway shows, whilst being able to join you in the bedroom later for a kindred discussion of the Dow Jones and new advancements in the local beat poetry scene? Surely such a scenario would be less detrimental than your current trip to the local pleb-cinematorium to view the latest "Paranormal Movie 3: Much Ado About Theatrical Flatulence." Now I am aware that I have left you in a state of awe and disdain for your current romantic situation, my fair maiden, but I wish to let you know that your fair message shall be allotted for consideration amongst my busy schedule any time. I am aware that I have also offended your current romantic bane, but rest assured, I shall be more than willing to settle our score in a cut-throat game of Chivalry: Medieval Warfare. Now this, mi'lady.. Doesn't it just alert you gleefully to the factoid that "chivalry" isn't dead?. ;)

Please, don't be shy, your brave and always fruitfully gifted white-knight awaits your personal message to u/LinkinParkiplier96. Please also check me on my home subreddits, r/malefashionadvice and r/beards; for where I am most appreciated for my display of dashing sense of chic.

Fedorably yours,

LinkinParkiplier96