I have the brain of a scientist, the face of a Calvin Klein model, the thrusting power of a gorilla, and a ♥♥♥♥♥ like a burmese python.

My mind is so sharp that it could cut steel and my ♥♥♥♥♥ is harder than cement.

My BAC is so high that mosquitos die of alcohol poisoning after injesting my blood.

My fingers are as proficient on a guitar fretboard as they are inside your mother.

I ball so hard they think I need chemotherapy.

My inspiration to others puts that speech from "Independence Day" to shame.

I drip harder than Hurricane Katrina when she broke the levees.