"i don't believe in djent. i'm a djent skeptic."
"calling this pop punk is so unhinged but i see the vision"
"unapologetically uncool music for sensitive people (me)"
"it's like being dead for approximately 54 minutes"
"metalcore is just heavy metal for twinks"
"the living tombstone if freddy fazbear had a cocaine overdose"
"i listen to this band to get weird women to like me. not working so far but i'm still trying"
"got me feeling like i'm an alien looking at an unknown galaxy in awe"
"I'm honestly not even ready for ts I feel like I'm too human to comprehend what this ♥♥♥♥ is gonna sound like"
"как писька встала в начале, так до конца и не опускалась."
"bro made an entire account to cry about djent"
"when an rymer mentions production an angel loses its wings"
"♥♥♥♥♥ я от этой ♥♥♥♥♥ все 14 минут под столом валялся"
"go away daniel"
"my bus set on fire when i was listening to this song lmaoo"
"oh god this is so so beautiful *pulls trigger*"
"♥♥♥♥♥♥ awesome. and come to brazil"
"wow this BAND is so brave :o they REFUSE to RELEASE music!"
"if this album was a buttplug id already have a prolapsed anus"
"so you're an architects fan okay name 5 buildings"
"Art IS subjective but you're tripping bro"
"piss your pants core"
"why am i on all fours"
"i crave more exactly like this bc this song feels like how i imagine a lobotomy does i love it"
"I don't deserve to listen to this album"
"jacob charlton is the closest thing a man could get to a lesbian so its fine"
" 'ooooh i wouldve listened to it but the production is so bad oooooh the production i just cant stand the production' im gonna shove you in a locker"
"we get it: you watch south park, your girlfriend broke up with you, and you need to take a ♥♥♥♥. you didn't need 37 minutes to prove that."
"Why did this djent band make a djent record? Don't they know I HATE djent? Why didn't they make music I like? Are they stupid?"
"jesses vocals are so good i wish he were real"
"I'll give you $100 to listen to 1 undistorted guitar in your life"
"it feels like not even a good brick"
"turns out all i had to do to understand this album was actually get some ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ therapy and work on myself. who knew?"
"I AM SO ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ SICK AND TIRED OF LISTENING TO DJENT GETME OUT OF THIS HELL GETMEOUTGETMEOUTGETMEOUTGETMEOUTLETMEOUTLETMEOUTLETMEOUT I CAN'T TAKE THIS ♥♥♥♥ NO MORE"
"i took a nap right after writing this review and i accidentally left perverts on loop so this was just playing while i was asleep and as soon as i woke up i think i saw god"
"i like it when they make the loud noises with the guitars"
"it's all PINK and GAY just like me"
"black metal purists gatekeeping a genre pioneered by a bunch of schizophrenic teenagers from norway"
"doc told me to up my prog metal intake. or else i'm gonna die"
"a concept album about putting me to sleep"
" 'why are prog metal bands addicted to having 70+ minute albums?' why is the sky addicted to having clouds?"
"P.E.M.D.A.S (Please Excuse My Dark Ambient Swag)"
"Dream Theater Fans Unsure Whether New Album Cover Art is AI or Just Really Bad"
"Come to Bashkortostan"
"damn vessel you a freak [Sleep Token - Vore]"
"ignore shoutbox and twitter and just hit play"
"ambient fans when they take off their headphones outside (they never heard this wonderful sound composition before)"
"piss vinyl"
"don't take djentanyl, kids"
"oh aggressive evolution i could kiss you passionately if you were more than a song on an album"
"love-hate reladjentship"
"progjester is really living up to his name with these takes"
"God i need you to hit me with the prog rock phase again, i need it"
"Real Emo only consists of you and I engaged in a kiss"
"coworker-core"
"bruh most of this sounds like a disney rock opera soundtrack"
"listening to this first time and i can't stop laughing. this is the Kenny G of metal, ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥"
"just prog my ♥♥♥♥ up fam"
"Wow these guys must smoke loads of crack, seriously."
"yikes. grown adults made and listen to this album"
"i hope it is their last album"
"It's been nine years and I still have never heard this. I chicken out before hitting play every time like I'm about to bungee jump."
"Warning: contains more masturbation than your adolescence."
"they predicted AI generated music"
"This band is single-handedly fueling my inner early 2000s vampire latex fetish"
" 'you had to be there! you had to be there man! you don't get it!' i insist as i slowly turn into a corn cob"
"we gotta talk about whats going on in australia to create ♥♥♥♥ like this"
"when i wrote this song, i was in a really dark place at the time. i didn't know where the light switch was, and also i think the lightbulb had blown, and i wrote this song in a pitch black room."
"radiohead when they saw the computer: OKAYYYYYY"
"this ep feels like the Resident Evil movie in musical form no i will not elaborate"
"headphones aren't enough I need to have passionate sex with rosemary by deftones"
"im going to be alone for the rest of my life [Deftones - Sextape]"
"the only sleep token i want is when i'm token a joint and listening to sleep, know what i'm sayin"
"elon musk [Deafheaven - Lonely People With Power]"
"i don't think i've felt gayer after listening to an album. 4.5."
"trent reznor is best anime girl"
"it's not like they have a gun to their heads forced to make songs like this lol"
"This gonna do numbers on divorced british dads playlists"
"Pretty sure this song was just Jordan and Sam in a room"
"*guy who listened to ok computer voice* whoa this is just like ok computer"
"i didn't think it was possible to have an orgasm for an hour until i listened to this"
"Jordan Fish is just the unreal engine of music at this point"
"This makes me want to become a corrupt politician and make the lives of the working class hell. Can't wait to gamble away all my parliament funds!"
"Как же меня заебал этот альбом, потому что крутил его раз по 200, потому что очень хорош"
"Wow! This is why vocalists shouldn't exist!"
"sudden urge to buy all flannels from local thrift store"
"Vocalist sounds like the kid who would blast the Soviet anthem on the school bus"
"после прослушивания данного альбома мне резко захотелось купить машину и носить офисные костюмы"
"my neighbors are going to love this new album. they have no choice."
"Conservative OK Computer."
"Bro religious experienced so hard that he switched accounts"
"Дарк эмбиент анекдоты"
"my za is male vocalist, humorous, vulgar, boastful, drugs, surreal, crime, cryptic, abstract, sexual, a cappella"
"this album is brothers karamazov for mentally ill people"
"Brothers Karamazov is also for mentally ill people"
"♥♥♥ встает когда слушаю"
"my airfryer rings the exact same note as the last note in this song when the food's done cooking, I can't stop thinking about radiohead everyday at lunch, ♥♥♥♥ my life"
"Буквально "плакал когда какал" ♥♥♥♥♥ пик поэзии русской музыки"
"Fata Morgana makes me want to stand in the corner while Courtney throws bricks at me"
"Listened to this while doing a Bluey coloring book"
"Jarvis, I'm bored. Make the peak band release peak music again."
"WORD? LETTER? PUNCTUATION? NUMBER??"