☑ An Epic Journey

Get ready to:
☑ Roll dice to decide your fate
☑ Talk to animals, and maybe a few objects
☑ Wonder why you’re saving the world when you could be romancing a vampire 🧛‍♂️

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☑ 🧙 You’ll believe in magic again
☐ ✨ Beautifully cursed
☐ 🎮 Pretty good
☐ 😐 Meh, more realistic than my last D&D doodles


☑ 🏆 Dungeon Master level
☐ 🔥 Fireball-worthy fun
☐ 🐀 Mildly entertaining rat-slaying simulator
☐ 😴 "I'm here for the story, not the turn-based combat"


☑ 🎶 Choirs of angels
☐ 🔥 Epic soundtracks, even for Goblin brawls
☐ 📢 "They really voice-acted the giant rat..."
☐ 🙉 My ears demand a long rest


☐ 👦 First-time adventurers
☑ 👩 Seasoned heroes
☐ 🧓 “Back in my day, D&D was pen and paper”
☐ 💀 Only if you survived Dark Souls


☐ 💻 Hope you upgraded last decade
☑ 🍟 Frying egg on GPU kind of intensive
☐ 🌌 Go ask Elon for a spare PC
☐ 🚀 NASA-grade required to see every hair on Gale’s head


☐ 🥠 Fits on a magical floppy disk
☑ 📂 Significant chunk of your hard drive
☐ 💾 Consider a backup hard drive, just in case
☐ 🌌 Prepare to sacrifice a few Terabytes


☐ 🍞 Fresh as a baguette
☐ 🛠️ Not as easy as "roll a D20 and pray"
☑ 🧠 Brain-bending
☐ 💀 "I thought I was prepared for the Underdark..."


☑ 💼 Minimal XP grind
☐ 📈 Enough to make XP worthwhile
☐ 🎲 Might as well call it “Grindmaster’s Gate”
☐ 👴 Another life needed for all those side quests


☐ ✍️ Could write it on a napkin
☐ 📖 Average adventure book
☐ ❤️ Beautifully broken heroes
☑ 🧙‍♂️ Becomes your new reality


☐ ☕ Perfect for a coffee break
☐ ⏳ Half a campaign long
☐ 🕯️ Full campaign commitment
☑ ♾️ “I should probably take a Long Rest…”


☑ 💸 Worth every gold piece
☐ 🔥 Wait for a Steam sale
☐ 🤔 Only if you skipped dinner
☐ 🐉 Might be cheaper to hire your own Dungeon Master


☐ 🦟 Never saw one… but did hear of one
☑ 🕷️ Minorly annoying, like a gnat
☐ 🐍 Feels like taming a bugbear
☐ 🪲 Basically Baldur's Glitch 3

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10 / 10