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goonology chronicler

Finno-Korean hyperwar
The Finno-Korean Hyperwar, also known as the Hwan-Suomi Hyperwar, was an ancient war between the two most powerful empires in the world at the time. The Proto-Finnic Holy Roman Khaganate faced off against the Hwan Empire in a cataclysmic conflict that crashed the world with almost no remnants of humanity. Few groups survived the war, which claimed both the Proto-Finnic Khaganate and the Hwan Empire. It is well known for bringing the end of the Hyper Era and tossing the world into a "dark age". The war was fought from 12,245 to 12,172 BC. It is commonly debated how great of a role the secondary powers (such as the autistic dogsled-riding Yupik Eskimos) played in the war, as it is suggested that important powers like the Armenian Pipe Smoking Autocrats, the Norf-Zogs and Egyptian technocracies allied with the Hwan to stop the Finnish alongside the Pre-Irish Holy Jihadists and Neo-Swiss Banking Fanatics.

Goon War
567 billion years ago before yakub and the agarthian tribe blew up the earth the great goon war happened when goonhahmed and goonsus fought a war over their goonigion. Goonhahmed believed in Goonslam and Goonsus believed in Goonitianity and together they killed billions of people and trillions of creamcells it ultimately came to an end when the great scientist Goonfred Goonstein blew up the moon killing everyone in the great goon battle the battle of the hard bulge at the end all combatant lay in rest in remnants of Goonmanity

The Great Goon Brothers
After the goonfathers had merged into one entity, the universe was in shambles and need to be restored, so goon god gooned into the universe to created his 5 brothers, whose names are Gooniac, Goonessa, Goonhahmed, Goonisius, Goonrial