Recent reviews by Smugass Braixen-Chan

Requires you to log into a Ubisoft account (Which doesn't work!!!) to make sure I'm not pirating a ~25 year old game that I purchased on Steam.

Refunding and buying it DRM free on GOG, because the GOG version doesn't assume I'm a criminal for purchasing their game.

Japan deserves a reward for finding a way to make porn boring and unsexy.

Newer Total War games SUCK, so I only played older Total War games.

Creative Ass-embly remedy this by breaking the older Total War games with unwanted and unnecessary updates.

Combines Legend of Zelda with Animal Crossing...

... And somehow loses the charm of both.

Edit: You know a game is a special kind of bad when posting negative reviews earns you Jesters from salty fan-boys.

Ryza (The character herself) is not very interesting or likeable, and her default outfit makes her look like the victim of some sort of clothing based explosion. As always, the only reason she is a popular character is because Weeaboos want to stick their ♥♥♥♥ in it.

The story-line is boring and pedestrian. Nothing interesting ever happens, and the character development feels incredibly forced. (I was only able to get half-way through the campaign before I shelved the game, so I don't know what happens beyond chapter 5)

Where the game really falls apart is the gameplay, which is predicated on the Alchemy System. One can spend hours clicking around in the Alchemy Menu, and getting caught up in the minutia of the complex alchemy system, and get absolutely no-where. All while Ryza vomits up a never-ending string of one-liners. She literally says something every few seconds and it gets very annoying very quickly.

This is very much a subjective not-recommend, because some people might enjoy this sort of "Having an excel spreadsheet open in another tab" sort of game. I do not.

I can actually take Ryza seriously (During the rare moments where she's being serious) when she doesn't look like a tragic victim of some sort of clothing based explosion.

I hope this costume makes it into Ryza 3, because this is Ryza's canon outfit as far as I'm concerned.

Best Friend was in a really bad spot. So I bought the entire Humongous Ent' Collection to Stream.

I can now un-ironically confirm that Putt-Putt cures depression.

I just got Top 4% on Locomotion Retro (Both 3-Ball Arcade and 3-Ball Sim') and I have absolutely no idea how!!!

That pretty much sums up most of these tables. On a lot of the boards, you can't even trap the ball with your flippers. So you have to just knock the ball away or try to drop catch.

I will say that these boards teach you to nudge. (Your only option for manipulating the ball, most of the time) So if you are like me and have an aversion to nudging/bumping the table around, then these boards are great for breaking that hang-up.

As for the tables themselves, none of them are real tables from the era. I'm not too familiar with real 1950s tables. But these ones have a very "Thrown together" feel to them. (And given the price for 27 Tables, they probably were) So I doubt they would compete with the original classics.

Overall: The objectives are very simple (The rules take about a minute to read and memorise) but the ball WILL drain shortly after you pull the plunger unless you are lucky (or are a god of nudging)

If you just want to knock a ball around for a few minutes while jamming out to your own music (Since there is no in-game music: I recommend searching for Rock 'n' Roll and Rockabilly on Youtube) then go for it. But I wouldn't recommend this to experienced Pinball Players, or people who want the genuine 1950s Experience.

A fun and relaxing City Building Game. Most of the game's systems are easy to figure out. Even the water physics aren't too hard to control. Just make sure your colony always has enough food and water, and your colony will survive and thrive...

This game is pure Total War without any of the BS.

It is rather bare bones. But if you just want to play Total War, instead of "Total War, but buried under a ton of poorly implemented mechanics" then play this game.