Life slapped me, I couldn't stand it

I slapped my d ick, my d ick still stands

Maybe my d ick makes a better man than me

Someone stabbed me, I still stood

I stabbed my d ick, my d ick collapsed

Maybe I make a better d ick than my d ick

When encountering my crush

Even my d ick toughens up

Yet I cower and say nothing

Holding my masturbation cup, I lie to my d ick, saying that it's a warm vagina

Standing up, my d ick lies to me, saying that it's a warm world

When I'm single, my d ick rejoices, as it gets to be caressed

When I have a girlfriend, my d ick rejoices, because it gets to have a new warm home

Maybe I'm a part of my d ick, and not the other way around

If u suck your own d ick while you turn 18, it is considered illegal due to gravitational time dilation.
Ok so hear me out. Due to gravitation time dilation, your upper body is technically older then your lower body, that is ofcourse ... due to Gravitational Time Dilation. Gravitational Time Dilation is the effect gravity has on time. The lower the gravitational potential, the faster time is. Knowing this, because your d ick has more gravitational potential then your head, your head is older then your d ick (by like less then a millionth of a nanosecond but that doesn’t matter). So if you were sucking your own d ick while you turned 18, your head would age first. This means your 18 year old head would be sucking you 17 year old d ick. and you're a pedophile. that's all i wanted to say ! Thank you for listening to my TED Talk.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5deFvNhxs4w

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