Infinite ♥♥♥. You sit on the toilet to jack off, but you begin to ♥♥♥ uncontrollably. After ten spurts you start to worry. Your hand is sticky and it reeks of semen. You desperately shove your ♥♥♥♥ into a wad of toilet paper, but that only makes your balls hurt. The ♥♥♥ accelerates. It’s been three minutes. You can’t stop ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. Your bathroom floor is covered in a thin layer of baby fluid. You try to ♥♥♥ into the shower drain but it builds up too fast. You try the toilet. The ♥♥♥ is too thick to be flushed. You lock the bathroom door to prevent the ♥♥♥ from escaping. The air grows hot and humid from the ♥♥♥. The ♥♥♥ accelerates-

I love my life (sarcasm)