Reason 1: he protec but he also attac
Reason 2: they can regenerate limbs if you need to whip up a quick dinner you can just chop off a raccoons leg
Reason 3: they're obidient. you want someone dead? your raccoon will kill them james bond style no questions asked
Reason 4: raccoon piss cures cancer
Reason 5: theyre really good at video games. if you suck ♥♥♥♥ at csgo, a raccoon will carry your fat ass no problem
Reason 6: need protection against someone with a gun? raccoons are naturally bullet proof. end my suffering, put me out of my misery just pull the ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ trigger
Reason 7: raccoons can destroy any animal in a 1v1 put a cat and a raccoon in a boxing ring, that cat'll get rekt
Reason 8: ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ see you walking a dog, they ignore your ass. ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ seeing you walking a raccoon, youve scored a get out of virgin free card.
Reason 9: raccoon ♥♥♥♥ cures hepatitis
Reason 10: just look at them, they're ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ adorable even if you didnt chop off your dogs vagina this hunk of an animal would still be getting laid 10x more
Boom there you go 10 reasons raccoons are the best pets. If youre still not convinced that you need a raccoon in your life then congratulations; youre probably gonna wind up a ♥♥♥♥♥ ass ♥♥♥♥♥ so do yourself a favor and take a bubble bath with your favorite rubber ducky and a high-voltage toaster to put yourself out of your miser-cut