:steamhappi:

Dio is right, I actually downloaded the map and decoded the message as well. I wanted to add onto something D I O said- friends fight sometimes, and unless they've completely cut you off they likely value your friendship more than you perceive, and even if that isn't the case recognizing your problems is the first step to overcoming them. Hell, unless they're alt accounts you had two other people help you make this map. Cherish them.

It takes exhausting time. It's not part of the whole story, but the writer of one's life needs the proper place to correct his story in peace. As you wade out of the sand, you can spend every other second finally shaking off the granules that have been irritating you since you set foot in the seething desert. Take chances with friends who, even if they cannot completely understand that pain, unconditionally support your recovery. Make your own path to freedom and define what life is to you in that period of self-exploration during that momentary period of respite.

You'll be alright in the darkness, just don't drop your light prematurely. Let's be your lantern and let yourself the chance to find the exit unto the storm outside. It'll be a raging one, but that cold rain will be bliss once you can finally take a breath of that fresh air; then in time, the deluge will clear and you'll be able to parade further into what really feels beyond self-preservation. Take care, friend.

Me and a three friends found and decoded what you wrote. I wanted to go out of my way to share a message personally from all of us. Sorry to hear that you're in trouble and that you're going through such an awful period in your life. I can't imagine the process its been. Although we may have never had the liberty to meet, I must say that you're far off of what your mind tells.

The fact that you acknowledge these issues and know where they stem from are the key to realizing that you are miles off from being the bad guy. You yearn to fix and overcome those aches - you're bitter, and you're seeking escape. I live in a horrid country too and I'm just as upset at the way we're treated. However, persist enough and you will find your way out. It's easier said than done and the environment we're surrounded has heavy influence on our perspective. It's part of the number one contributor to the way we feel. We're sponges that soak up anything around us - and what we absorb directs our demeanor.

Not unlucky. I was somewhere similar before. Doing it alone is a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ struggle, but it's possible despite how empty and pointless it'll seem.
That feeling of self preservation isn't an instinct - it's you, it's a different perspective you shut off to manage the life you've lived better. Try to understand it and listen, ask questions and answer them, keep breathing.
The hardest question will be what's the point; but that's exactly it. It was never something you are meant to know or make, it's a thing that is found, whether that be within yourself, others or purpose. It isn't worth giving up because you can't see it when you're in the dark.
It'll take time, but you'll find your solace. If not today, then the next - we can always try again tomorrow. You just have to keep moving.

hey dude i hope you're doing alr and that you find the help you need . theres always someone out there who cares about you, it might be hard to reach out for help, but you can do it :)