Recent reviews by Stinky-Winky

After 5 hours you've experienced everything the game has to offer. Very unoriginal, almost everything in it has been done better numerous times before. The building is building, I don't know what else to say about it other than if you've played a game with base building then you've experienced all it has to offer in that respect. Combat is okay if not a little janky and that's probably the most well made aspect of the entire game. It feels like a mobile game and that is not a good thing. After 10 hours of playing with friends i was burned out completely but stayed with it because maybe something new will happen and my friends are playing but it never got better, it just continued to get more and more boring.
I was really enjoying it until i resource grinded for an hour or 2 and built my entire base and got everything i needed so now any rewards or progress is completely redundant because i have everything i need and want so what is the point of getting anything else?
The devients are kind of cool but since i already have everything i need, i have the max amount of devient tanks and they're all full, there is no reason to get more of them.
A mile wide and an inch thick is the best way to describe it.

Broke a controller. Broke a keyboard. Broke a screen. Got every achievement. Good game.
Thanks Mike Wazowski.

This was something i was actually really looking forward to trying. I love the simple graphics and the setting is quite unique, the first true shoulslike. It's a shame the combat, the thing the majority of the game revolves around, was designed by a 3 year old. Hit boxes are worse than the cs2 launch hit boxes, it's slow, it's not fun, the enemies have strange delays on attacks and then the same attacks will have no delays so i'll go ♥♥♥♥ myself then and there is nothing intuitive apart from the different "shells" you can pick up. Wow they did one thing different from regular souls likes, i guess, if you don't count armour, weapon or shield abilities as being the same thing but better and more variety so it doesn't even have that going for it.
Went in with high expectations, rightly so due to all the praise I've seen this below average game get and yeah it's fair to say the game doesn't even nearly live up to the expectations in any aspect aside from the simple graphics which are very nice on the eyes, and the setting, which is just a breath of fresh air. Nothing else comes close to anything that can be described as adequate. Don't even get me started on the useless platforming. It's bad. You set the game underwater and somehow platforming is one of the worst parts of it. Why after the "swim" stamina bar depletes does my tiny little hermit crab dude turn into a brick? It's a really bad implementation because a mud crab doesn't weigh 400kg so why does a tiny hermit crab?
Why does dodging just straight up no work sometimes? Sometimes the button doesn't work at all, i'll press it 3 times at least for it to dodge on the last press. Sometimes i'll dodge out of the way of an attack, clearly out of the way of the attack, but still take the hit. Is this a hitbox error or an error with the dodging? either way, it's not good enough.
Enjoy the game, don't enjoy the game, buy or don't buy it. I just needed a little rant about the most disappointing gaming purchase I've made since anthem, and i even enjoyed that more than this crap.
I love soulslikes, I've played a ton of them, good and bad and played through every fromsoft soulsbourne game, some multiple times and some 100% achievement runs, I love these types of games and am very very familiar with them. This is a terrible game, dressed up in a popular genre it would've done better to stay out of, with a pretty coat of paint on it.

Almost 5 hours in and i have no idea what I'm supposed to do. I just follow the quest, drop things when my inventory is full and i have no idea what they are. What is this? What is anything? Does anything matter? I got some cool skills i never use because i can just left and right click and things die? Skilling seems almost completely pointless because again, what is anything in this? Seen a hell of a lot of pay to win about this game trying to find what anything is or means. I bought a storage house or something, again not very sure, that i had to look up a guide on how to use because after buying it, interacting with it is nothing, you have to go find a certain npc somewhere else to store things in the storage unit/house/thing, again, no idea what anything is. Go play runescape, i despise that game and I'd play that 24/7 for the rest of my life before wasting more time on this garbage. What i kind of half picked up on with the story, which I've completely forgotten within hours of it, was complete nonsense garbage.
It's a game set up to get you to dump money into it, with gameplay that is objectively bad. Left click, press a direction button, press interact button. Well done, you've learned the game controls. Add in dump real money into the game and that is it. Should be Free to play.

Before playing this i has a massive peen, big balls, a wife and kids, a rippling 6 pack, biceps as big as watermelons and was a respected member of society.

I am now morbidly obese, have a mangina, live in my parents basement and don't see the sun anymore and am violently racist. 10/10

I like the part in the game where I turned it off. Don't know why i believed any of the nonsense about it being a good game now.
In the words of Homer J. Simpson: The suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked.

After doing a 100% achievement run on Dark Souls 1, Dark Souls 3 and Elden Ring, I am getting a refund on this. The worst game I've played in a long time, if not ever. It's just a bad game. Plays horribly, massive amounts of enemies in random places for no reason, grass grows faster than your character swings a dagger, uglier than your grannies minge, a stamina bar that empties faster than my balls, it caused me to become a virgin again, made me spend all my money on bitcoin, undropped my balls, gave me a crippling attraction to big beefy men, what even are the bosses in this game? A bunch of long necked hussies that's what.
You can't argue with these reasons, these are scientifically proven facts of life.
Actually hate this game, actually getting a refund, actually leaving Dark souls 2 out of my from soft achievement lists and I am more than happy to do that. I SPENT OVER 40 HOURS GRINDING DS3 COVENANT ITEMS AND I'LL DO IT 10 TIMES OVER BEFORE I THINK ABOUT TRYING THIS AGAIN.

Alright idea, kind of looks okay at times and yeah the rest is a bit ♥♥♥♥. It feels and plays like a cheap game and the combat, ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥'s the worst part of the game. Kind of sad I was looking forward to this at one point in time.

If you like Divinity: Original Sin 2, you'll probably like this cos it looks and feels and plays almost identically. I didn't like it, so i don't like this. This was 6 hours of trying to force myself to enjoy something i wasted nearly $90 on. It's just updated graphics on a style of game that should've died 20 years ago.

ROCK AND STONE