24
Products
reviewed
87
Products
in account

Recent reviews by HOUSHOU MARINE MASSIVE TITS

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Showing 1-10 of 24 entries
1 person found this review helpful
28.5 hrs on record (14.9 hrs at review time)
Was the wait for Chapter 3 & 4 worth it? Hell yeah
Posted 7 June.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
1 person found this review helpful
62.0 hrs on record (9.5 hrs at review time)
I made the mistake of launching Project DIVA Mega Mix+ at 2am.
Megurine Luka came on the screen and so did I.
The way her hair bounced, that voice smoother than melted butter on a saxophone solo…
I knew right then I wasn’t gonna play the game.
I was gonna play with myself.

She started performing DYE in that tight, leg-exposing, career-ending outfit and I lost litres, bro. LITRES.
I’m not talking millilitres.
I’m talking two-litre Coke bottle levels of shame ejected from my body with the force of a hydraulic cannon.

By the time she hit that final twirl and looked directly into the camera, I was a dehydrated husk clutching my desk like it was the last lifeboat on the Titanic.
My room smelled like despair and electrolytes.
My GPU was crying.
My chair had PTSD.
I stood up, legs shaking like a PS2 loading screen, and whispered “thank you” to my monitor before collapsing like an empty Up n go.

I’m not proud. But I’m not sorry either.
Luka is digital perfection and I will keep losing litres to her until my body physically can’t produce anymore.
At this point I think I’m just exhaling powdered shame.

If you hear someone moaning Just Be Friends in the dark at 3am, no you didn’t
Posted 29 April. Last edited 29 April.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
No one has rated this review as helpful yet
0.3 hrs on record
Yay now i can use raytracing and turn my pc into a bomb
Posted 12 April.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
4 people found this review helpful
8.6 hrs on record (5.1 hrs at review time)
SHE DIDN'T GET HER KNOCKERS OUT :(((
Posted 1 December, 2024.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
4 people found this review helpful
4 people found this review funny
17.2 hrs on record (6.1 hrs at review time)
Where is the shag function???? Why is this not real CBT???
Posted 1 November, 2024.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
No one has rated this review as helpful yet
101.6 hrs on record (95.5 hrs at review time)
Lockpick
Posted 12 May, 2024.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
No one has rated this review as helpful yet
38.9 hrs on record (3.3 hrs at review time)
Gamble
Posted 6 May, 2024.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
No one has rated this review as helpful yet
152.0 hrs on record (88.6 hrs at review time)
Early Access Review
The nutcracker tore my balls off
Posted 24 March, 2024. Last edited 3 May, 2024.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
No one has rated this review as helpful yet
32.5 hrs on record (24.1 hrs at review time)
i love putting myself in crippling debt to get better benchmark numbers
Posted 5 December, 2023.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
No one has rated this review as helpful yet
0.3 hrs on record
I broke my finger
Posted 17 November, 2023.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
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Showing 1-10 of 24 entries