SOME ONE WAS TAKING A SHOWER WITH HIS DAD TODAY!!!! :P

Ive always wanted to put a bear on the wall at my work...

I make bears!

So I'm buying a bag of dog food for my dog. While in the check-out line, a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. Why else would I be buying dog food, RIGHT??? I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Dog food Diet again, and that I probably shouldn't because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in intensive care with tubes coming out of my orifices. I told her it was a Perfect Diet and all you do is load your pockets with Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.) Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle's ass and a car hit me.

your on my wall chuck it wasnt directed at you bud

huh?