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You've been visited by the propane god, I tell you hwat. Copy and paste this to 5 of your friend's profiles, or Hank Hill will bring the pro pain.

hello! sorry for scare, but just notice profile on the Steam Community. you know how hard it are to find girls who play video game nowadays??? well, Im glad I stumble apon this little prof cause I gotta say…. ur prety cute!! ^^ ((sorry for scare, no trouble ) well… I was wondering if u wanted to play tf2 with me (Im a plat sniper, so I can carry my little princes if need. =-}) CUZ I really want someone to pub wit me.. hey hey, maybe even I could get you unusual as little gift. you like Buring? Me too, me too. anyways any, do you maybe have Skype? (no scare. no scare, I iust like meating eye to eye.) if we skype, I think we could have some good buddy commucation. :)) ( i can even turn down my dubstep music in the background if you want…) add me if you want please, I jsit need friend maybe even girlfriend, to play video with.m I can be the perfect guy for you, trust!! ill buy whatever, do whatever, okay?? jsit pick up that phone and CALL. :)

Daddy

oh god they've found me

Hello sir/ma'am/attack helicopter, I am a secret agent from the glute protection agency. It has come to my attention that your glutes have not been inspected yet, which is a violation of the glute treaty of 1862. Please call me at 1-800-GIVEME-GLUTES for a free glute inspection, or you will be required to pay a 2million dollar fine, which can be worked off in the Afterlife strip club.

Thanks!

-Super Secret Glute Inspector Agent (SSGIA) Kaje Tertius
Chief Deputy Glute Inspecto

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )