103 people found this review helpful
66 people found this review funny
10
4
2
5
2
2
2
14
Recommended
0.0 hrs last two weeks / 0.0 hrs on record
Posted: 3 Oct, 2024 @ 10:25pm

Average day of a Mishima player:

Wake up, wavedash out of bed, say a quick prayer in front of the TMM shrine near the bed.
Head over to the kitchen, eat a hopkick for breakfast.
Proceed to boot up Tekken 8 and practice EWGF. For 11 hours. Go into ranked, see the other guy is using Nina, plug. Next opponent is Dragunov, plug. Next opponent is Bryan, plug. Next opponent is Heihachi. "Finally a honest character. I must show my superiority". Spam hellsweep in neutral, 1,1,2 to punish -90 moves. Win by using a df2 by accident. "That's enough Tekken for today".

Time to get out of the house.
Wavedash into the bathroom, put hair gel on to get the spikiest of hair. "Casual or formal?". End up putting on business pants and a leather jacket. Tuck the leather jacket into the pants.
Rush out of the house, bumping into everyone on the way to his destination. When confronted by angry people pushed aside "Just sidestep, scrub" is the only answer.
Get to the party. Stay in a dark angle, arms crossed. A girl approaches. "Wow you've got a really muscular left arm. Do you do much excercise?". Answer "Plenty". "Sure it's no steroids?". Angrily gawk at her, then say "This is reality". "What do you do for a living?". Think about it for 2 seconds, then reply "Execution and neutral". Confused, she walks away. "Can't even kbd, like all weak scrubby female characters. Pathetic". When someone comes over and points out "Nobody invited you", grab the nearest valuable good and say "Power is everything" while wavedashing out of the building. When held back and punched by the other patrons, plug out of the commotion.

Alone, wavedashing in the streets amidst the darkness of night, get home. Once there, tweet a save-scummed Fujin rank screenshot to Arslan Ash, fruit of hard work and dedication and much EWGF training in practice mode. "I'm coming for you at EVO 2025". Backdash back to bed, sleep, repeat.
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8 Comments
Magnus Kaktus 5 Oct, 2024 @ 4:57pm 
I love it too @Aziz
Aziz 5 Oct, 2024 @ 1:49pm 
Best copy pasta lol
HYPER MACH-X 5 Oct, 2024 @ 11:06am 
HAHAHAHAH!!
Magnus Kaktus 4 Oct, 2024 @ 2:24pm 
Wavedash to your wallet son, we got Mishima peak to buy! :yell_eol:
Muzachary 4 Oct, 2024 @ 1:37pm 
Take my money, I mean points.
LikePaintbrush1 4 Oct, 2024 @ 12:46pm 
As a Mishima main, I can attest that this is my daily life. Those who aren't Mishimas will never understand our struggle.
Magnus Kaktus 4 Oct, 2024 @ 10:47am 
Thanks 🙏🏻
iNzAnE LuNaTiC 3 Oct, 2024 @ 11:37pm 
well put