"I'd walk on foot to Georgia to go see Kidz Bop."
"This poor child, look at the top of his head."
"Obama Bin Saden"
"Snap Black to reality!"
"I just don't drink water, it's bad!"
"Stupid Dumb-Dumb Gum-Gum Cat-Lookin Ass"
"Legend of Zelda: Macarana of Time."
"Lemme open my door, it might help my internet."
"That would be like Coke and Pepsi making a drink together." "Haven't you heard of Concksi?"
"The McDodo-I'm lovin' it!"
----- Thus ends 2017-2018. And with the end, 2018-2019 begins. -----
"We live in a Library."
"Guys, I actually downloaded the wrong video! I swear!" "No kidding you downloaded the wrong video, you downloaded fucking porn!"
"Pizza dinner for lunch!"
"Do you ever get like, full size centipedes crawling out of your computer?"
“Babies are born white.”
“You got my nose there!” “I don’t want your nose.” “I don’t either.”
"All day I've been spelling letters without words."
“Pakistanis are like creepers.”
“I love Word, and this Microsoft Office is a true treasure trove!”
“I saw a Muslim girl, I assumed she was speaking Muslim!”
"7-Up's Lawyers and the IRS are keeping me from making bootleg soda in my toilet and distributing it at a low price!"
"My Dwogey has Gut Womes."
“Haha, it touched my foot. Curry shoes!”
“I feel like I’m in Chernobyl.” “Why?” “My brain is heatwaved.”
"You're nine years old, plus a few more!"
“I don’t wanna, I just wanna Moana!”
“I choose whatever side of the card I’m dealt.”
"You're like Garfield but with no comedic value."
“Aww, I’m sad. I lost my sword.” “I LOST MY ARM!”
“Puss in Shoes!”
"I eat my own cum, so I live forever!"
"Weren't we called hunters and beaters?" "...you mean hunters and gatherers?"
“Peakaboo, bitch!”
"I'm HIB Positive!"
"Could you imagine if JFK hadn't been shot because he got a snapchat?"
"Why do I keep getting pummeled with pies?"
“I’ll break your logical head!”
"The skeleton is not rapeable!"
"I hate you! Go back to Bat Mitzvah!"
"It's 12? But 11 was 30 minutes ago!"
"They are both modeled after a Lamborgenie!"
"We should all get muskets and-" "-re-enact the first world war!"
"Senpai kept me nourished."
"Are you colorblind?" "Only in the Navy." "What?" "Cause they're so used to looking at the ocean it's all they see."
"How many chomosomes does he have?" "More than you."
"What is trypophobia?" "You, because you're a hole in my life. That was deep."
“Eating soup? Crunchy!”
"It was funny, it was a Hee-ha ho ho."
"Click Yes for One."
"Can I erase what just happened by saying hype?"
"Bald Head Headass."
"In India, we poop sidewalk."
“Are you restricting my speech of freedom?”
“Please, not the poop! i see brown in my sleep!”
"While scientists were buys studying this global-warming hocus-pocus, I was studying the 2000 realms of the omni-verse!"
"What were the L.A. Riots? Like, a basketball team?"
“I’m talking to the man in the river! I’m asking him to change his... pants!”
"You think I don't have patience? I have hundreds of patience!"
"How many peices of glass are you bringing?" "4, 2 for each pocket." "And you'll hijack a plane with that." "Yes."
"Stop being so anti-furretic!"
“Kung-Fu Pasta!”
“What did the minion wearing the yellow sweatshirt say?” “Supercollider! God damnit!”
"I'm trying to think of something big that can kill you." "Guilt?"
"Who was that person in Night on Mango Street?"
"It's not Avon Musk, it's a joke on words."
"You know how you write letters to Santa, or Mr. Hannukah?"
"Why did marinara sauce not give me unhappiness?"
"Can I be like a French person and eat worms?"
"The rain is increasing in it's rain-ness!"
"Alright guys, we won the round, and still growing!"
"What comes around, comes around."
"My trip down memory lane ended up with me getting my metaphorical wallet stolen."
“I wish my name was Techniqurey!”
"Italy actually lost Germany World War 2 and Soviet Weather."
“It’s the fight of a life! Thousands of feet are marched by me!”
"I'm gonnna crash your ethernet cable like I eat the donut."
“Not the carrots!”
"Half you ever known anyone but Hitler with the name Adolf?" "Adolf the Red Nose Reindeer."
"What if, instead of it saying "away away" it said "forward forward?"
"The Skniba Connection."
"Do you not egg your wife?"
"So is the midpoint show just a random collection of songs?"
"Did you really forget what you were gonna say halfway into your two word sentence?" "I was looking at the Yoshi thing."
"So they come from the land down under?" "Yea, where women plunder and men... rape."
"He survived by the nail clipper on his teeth."
“What if I chug a thug?”
"His life flashed before my eyes."
"Where do you think they all went?" "Cotton Eyed Joe." "What?"
"Suck my dick! No you won't, and soda can."
"Iraq War: Funny Glitches and Fails!"
“I didn’t dry hump the wall - I humped drywall!”
"Do I have to research homophobic slurs?"
“The Flosser: an endurance flossing test.”
"Nikhil, open this door! Nikhil! NIKHIL!"
"If you didn't win I would have bit off my dick." "For that to happen, it would have already have to have been in your mouth."
"Well, if you think about it, nobody has died from asphyxiation because global warming has not reached such a height that nobody has not enough oxygen."
"In WW2, didn't a bunch of workers like, change or something?"
“My quirkometer is going off the charts right now.”
"Idiot. You get diarhea and get glasses when you grow up."
"How long have you guys been listening to this?" "Since it began."
"Get in the car! It's fast! Night is coming soon! We're gonna fuck!"
“The ocean is my poop sock.”
"You're cursed, bitch!"
"He has terminal 4 virus."
"What did the potato say to the tomato? I start with a p... every morning."
"Crab-a Crab-a what now?"
"It's like the thing with Hitler and Trump." "What?" "Hillary and Trump. What about it?"
"This guy is kind of epic though. He said if your breath stinks... gay."
“Isn’t Ross a store?” “In what?” “REAL LIFE!”
"Mee-Maws normal sized cookies are disgusting."
“Don’t joke me - choke me.”
"Mario would never say that! He loves Palestine!"
"Kentucky is a landlocked country, you moron!"
"I mean we need to communicate more." "Well why didn't you just say that, instead of saying we need to cum more?"
“We a pack. Pack up.”
"Free pork rinds! Only 6.99 an hour!" "Free for 6.99 an hour?" "Yea, it challenges our modern definition of free."
"Leonardo De-Cringey"
"What are you gonna do with your life?" "Bang hookers and do cocaine." "Best life."
"What's the difference between a secretary and a whore?"
"I have eight ping - oh wait, that's my score."
"I'm not your typical coward."
“If life had wanted your son to have curry and bread he would have given it to him!”
"I'm not debating Schrodinger's Brick!"
"Damn girl, are you a 20-20? Because I have perfect vision!"
"4 years! Do you know how long that is?" "That's like 1 year with 1 extra day." "What?" "Skip year!"
"He probably wipes it down with baby bleach."
"No taxation without presentation!"
"Are you ok Annie? Are you ok Annie? MC Hammer! Are you ok Hammer?"
"What about JFK?" "He's in Guantanamo Bay. With Tupac." "And Biggie." "And Coolio!"
"EA Sports; it's how you play."
"Why do all of our teammates leave right after we lose?"
"The thing is, I don't exist. I am a pigment of your imagination."
"...Guatemala Beach." "What? Did you mean Guantanimo Bay?" "Yea."
"There's always a bigger bang... on the other time of the Mississippi."
"Well, you know what they say." "What?" "We got... level up. Lets level up."
"Do you take advantage of the Costco Meat Lover sale?"
"Who's your text-door neighbor?" "Hahahahaha... Hillary Clinton."
"I'm ok with people getting away with scams, as long as they're smart."
"The real elo was the friends we made along the way."