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Went to see the Minecraft movie with this man and the moment the highly anticipated quote "I am Steve" was uttered, this specimen whipped out his male member and started beating it to the rhyme of Ice Ice Baby by Vanilla Ice. May I also add, he was committing this horrendous act while squirting Whipped Cream directly into his mouth and making Lusty eye contact with me for the rest of the movie.

Evns It is that time of year again when I wish everyone a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!
Enjoy your time with your friends and family and see you next year!

And i also have a little treat for you too lewis. A new day will arise where you will be laying calmly in bed, rejoicing with such a good nigh of slumber. Then all of a sudden you hear a small quaint bird chirp, yelp with joy as a split second later, a great white shark will plumit through your roof and onto your bare chest. A baby it is not.

The day will come when you think you're happy, and you're lying in bed, suddenly, my bollocks will land firmly on you're forehead, and a drop of sweat will slide past my sack and tiggle the soft, smooth pouch that has made itself home on your head, and you'll know, right then, all you hopes and dreams has been shattered.

Dear Evns,

It's time for my annual Christmas message!
I hope last year was a great year and that you can end the year with friends and family.
May next year be just as great, or even better for you!

Merry Christmas, and a happy new year!

Rubbish Tex, dosent give good tex. My ass was not gaping, so rubbish tex!