Recent reviews by Crie

The game, for a lack of better words, is lackluster and is a poorly developed and designed game disguised as an asset-flip Foddian platformer. There were several points in the game where I genuinely questioned whether the game was playtested. The principle of the game is to drive an un-intuitively controlled vehicle through a series of long, difficult and brutal platforms. The idea is obviously well suited to incite frustration, but the execution and the design comes across as...bad. The developer has conflated difficulty with buggy physics based driving, it reminds me of unintended mountain climbing in Skyrim - you genuinely have no idea what the outcome is.

The physics are supposed to be the core of any rage-inducing platformer and especially in a driving game. But the wheels are like magnets- they constantly go ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ on you and flip your car around at every moment. The freight cargo section will have your car constantly juggle as it swings like a pendulum between the walls. The game wants you to climb walls with the car but it feels so inconsistent that it never feels you got the satisfaction of actually reaching the platform. 90% of the time, when you reach a platform - especially in the building complex level and higher - it feels unintended and buggy. You are fighting against the engine of the game, not the level design.

The game isn't as 'hard' as it advertises, its long and boring. If you get knocked off a platform, you won't be frustrated - you will just think about how much time you are wasting. A majority of the platforming is quite easy. I called it quits at the ice level, there are randomly generated boulders that can potentially knock you down into a tunnel that will take you down several levels - which is like 5 hours worth of gameplay.

I have no idea why they would think making the boulders spawn randomly a good idea at this part. I'm guessing the dev just gave up at that point. I just uninstalled it because the game wasn't actually fun enough for me to do that all that again.

The writing and voice acting thinks its being endearing, but sounds like it was written with ChatGPT by a fourth grader, and I am not trying to exaggerate.

What frustrates me about poor Foddian platformers is that they think they are emulating the beauty of Getting Over It by being quirky, random and obtuse - this is all just streamer bait so they can generate popularity. Make a challenging, hard or brutal platformer but make it make sense. The player needs to lose based on their own actions, not the game's own faults. Please do NOT waste your time or your money on this game.

After 100%ing the game (moonberry, hearts, B sides and C sides; just no golden strawberries). This game is simply the best platformer game I have ever played. The dash mechanic completely transforms level design to add so much more precision and agility that feels so damn satisfying. Not only that, but the devs constantly push the limits of the mechanics in each map that require you to constantly think about positioning, grabbing walls, jumping and using your dash. The game constantly ramps the challenge until you feel like an absolute beast in accomplishing levels. The devs have thought about every minute detail that makes you feel rewarded when playing the game.

The game can be frustratingly hard at times but never feels unfair for you to want to quit. The OST is genuinely so good that honestly you could just sit there and listen to the music. It is just so damn good. It is a must buy game for any platformer enthusiast and is SO CHEAP for how much gameplay you can get out of it. Why are you still reading this? BUY THE GAME!

Jump King is an awfully lazy display of game design and artificially inflated with difficulty. This game only gets the credit it deserves by being ridiculously hard by removing core functions within platforming. If it wasn't it just comes across as a lazy platformer game. The game obviously makes you angry, but after a point you just become apathetic to the game and just bored. The game constantly deprives of you of content and has you constantly retry levels (that you've completed hundreds if not thousands of times).

If this wasn't the case then Nexile (the developers) would actually try to make another game but have instead shilled more Jump King content for the past 5 years. Creating artificial difficulty bottlenecks doesn't create good design nor is a good business decision to keep repackaging. Best of luck to them otherwise.

I really wanted to like this game but unfortunately I'm giving it a negative review, mainly with what other negative reviews said - the core gameplay just isn't enough to stimulate the game.

The aesthetic and concept are the highlights of the game. It's a unique spin on cyberpunk and blade runner aesthetics, with oddly specific, esoteric and minimalist devices in bright orange colors gives an other-wordly and vintage sci-fi feel which I think is very cool. The music, color palette and pixelated design of the game are runners up. The 'concept' being that you are a mind scanner, fixing 'insanity' in an unstable society. It meshes well together and had a lot of potential. I think it carries the game for a lot of imaginative people, hence some of the gleaming reviews.

But the meat and potatoes of the game, the gameplay, has less stimulation than free mobile games. It doesn't help that the mini games or 'devices' you use are time consuming, there is no game tech or strategy, some of these mini games require you to just sit and wait, there is no reward for thinking outside the box, you will always have to do the minigames like 5-14 times for each person. The worst is probably the voice dial or the wiggle suction cups. Thinking ambitiously, if the game had its own unique controller to accommodate for these mini games it would be sort of fun. But with a mouse/controller there is nothing inherently challenging about any of these puzzles. They are essentially time padding in a time-dependent game. The timing and personality system just make it even worse, the game punishes you for completing the challenge by making you do more time-consuming mini games so you don't fry your patient's brains- this just continues until the day ends and people harass you, you'll have to do this several times with every patient. Why they thought to use the same mini-game for something you have to use on every patient, I don't know.

The timing system is just too brutal to make any actual progress. Using time as a currency as well for travelling to patient locations and getting new equipment just seems contradictory - play less of the game to access more of the game. Being left with like 5-20 seconds in the day is pretty much useless, you can't travel, spend it or even make any progress with patients. You might as well have 0 if you have <50 seconds on the clock which punishes being cautious about time.

The inventory system is effectively redundant, you'll just be switching three devices to suit insanity types - i mean you can't play the game otherwise, so what's the point? It might as well be automatic because there is no strategy with the inventory system. You can put the special type of devices but other than personality ones there is little incentive. Reducing stress is completely counteracted by restarting the day or putting a modicum of effort to finish the minigames.

I don't really see people talking about the insanity system or the diagnosing system which to me was another weak aspect of the game. I feel like the game could have leaned more on the psychological aspect a lot more in an L.A. Noire fashion. Paying attention to dialogue and details. Instead, you basically have a multiple choice system with a 'right answer', which removes all sense of challenge from it. By the minimum I felt like it shouldn't give us correct answer but attempts for the players to find out for themselves, creating narratives based on the answers we choose. To then label someone as 'sane' or 'insane' just doesn't make any sense in a game that talks about mental-illness which obviously is all grey areas. Sometimes the patients are delusional but sometimes they are just depressed or anxious, which I wouldn't label as insane. Labelling them as sane just punishes you because they then tell you that they were actually insane and did something crazy. The patient files are otherwise redundant, their diagnosis is always given some randomly nonsensical made-up name and the information on the file is worthless, it will always primarily frame it as insane so there is no valid information to take from it.

On top of all of this there is effectively no consequence to doing anything in the game, you can just do whatever and it doesn't really fall back on you. Sure, the patients have consequences but its whatever, the game just tells you its fine. I never really care about the uprising, the outsiders of the city, my daughter or the world-building because you don't actually really interact with any of these things, nor do you have any idea what they look like (to some extent). It lacks any nuance in a concept that solely grapples with nuance. Your daughter is the rationale behind doing things, but it doesn't motivate me whatsoever to even complete the mini games, like sorry kid but im not doing simon says 30 times to save you. I just don't care because the game doesn't really give me enough to care. It just info dumps things on you and then gives you more mini-games lol.

I think more than anything, the critiques made of the game can be framed as "that's done on purpose, the game shows you that binary choices of the mind are bad or that you can never do enough in this society" but this just fundamentally destroys the game, the game doesn't play with these ideas it's what the game is built on until the game itself is just miserable. In other words, the game doesn't have to be unfair just because what the game's world is unfair. Papers please being a good example of this, it balances the unfairness of the world with fair and enjoyable gameplay, demonstrating how you can be nuanced and look out for people rather than just mindblasting everyone or not mindblasting everyone.

Monkey is prett good, textures on animals are soooooooooooooooo sexy, game is also vervy sexy. My tigers are sos exy, but I DONT LIKE THE HIPPOS BECAUSE THEY ♥♥♥♥ EVERYWHERE. the guests are also kind of dum but i dont mind because they give me money which make my zoo even sexir. 11/10

This is a masterpiece like no other. it made me go boom boom in my panties

good

its good

in both incidents i have lost all my fingers getting up to 4 stars in cook serve dilicious,
my wife and children have left me for another man, saying "I've lost my dignity considering
what i've done", i just laugh, sitting on the street, homeless wondering whats the next part of
my life, they call us the boat people, "no" i say "call us the cook, serve delicious people"

11/10

Didn't cry cause I was a big boi.
11/10