sneef snorf

mom I pooped

I'm begging you.

Please stop talking like a pirate when we make love.

My boyfriend talks like a pirate when we have sex and it's driving me insane. He started doing this about three months ago (when we met) and won't stop. It's so annoying and I've told him I don't think it's funny or sexy but he called me a "land lubber" and a "scurvy dog" then threatened to "plunder my booty." I told him I was serious and he said he'd try to stop but that was several months ago and it's like he can't stop and it's some kind of compulsion.

Hey guys, did you know that in terms of male human and female Pokémon breeding, Vaporeon is the most compatible Pokémon for humans? Not only are they in the field egg group, which is mostly comprised of mammals, Vaporeon are an average of 3”03’ tall and 63.9 pounds, this means they’re large enough to be able handle human ♥♥♥♥♥, and with their impressive Base Stats for HP and access to Acid Armor, you can be rough with one. Due to their mostly water based biology, there’s no doubt in my mind that an aroused Vaporeon would be incredibly wet, so wet that you could easily have sex with one for hours without getting sore. They can also learn the moves Attract, Baby-Doll Eyes, Captivate, Charm, and Tail Whip, along with not having fur to hide nipples, so it’d be incredibly easy for one to get you in the mood. With their abilities Water Absorb and Hydration, they can easily recover from fatigue with enough water. No other Pokémon comes close to this level of compatibility.