yummers

i dont like you :(

lmao

This goober.
It took me four days to realize his name was 'CEO of lazy' and not just random letters.
Four. Fg. Pixels Days.

u r good, how much? yes

CEOOFLAZY in the flesh. Or rather, in the your fancy suit. I took the liberty of relieving you of your weapons; most of them were government property. As for the suit, I think you’ve earned it.
The borderworld, Xen, is in our control for the time being, thanks to you. Quite a nasty piece of work you managed over there. I am impressed. That’s why I’m here, Mr. Lazy. I have recommended your services to my employers, and they have authorized me to offer you a job. They agree with me that you have limitless potential. You’ve proved yourself a decisive man, so I don’t expect you’ll have any trouble deciding what to do. If you’re interested, just step into the portal and I will take that as a yes. Otherwise... well... I can offer you a battle you have no chance of winning. Rather an anticlimax, after what you’ve just survived. It's time to choose.