WINNING IS EVERYTHING

This word was redefined in March of 2011 by Charlie Sheen. Prior to this landmark event in progressive semantics, the old definition of 'winning' referred to the state of successfully accomplishing goals, besting competition, and generally not 'losing'. However, Mr. Sheen's version of the word is typed in all caps and requires the subject to be in possession of both tigers' blood and Adonis DNA, as well as maintaining the status of high priest Vatican assassin warlock. As of this writing, these lofty requirements have yet to be embodied by anyone other than Mr. Sheen.
"I'm Not Bipolar, I'm Bi-winning." - Charlie Sheen

"If people could just read behind the hieroglyphic, if they could put their freakin' cryptology hat on, they'd realize this isn't totally serious." - Charlie Sheen

"Can't is the cancer of happen." - CS

“Winning, anyone? Rhymes with winning. Anyone? Yeah, that would be us. Sorry, man, didn’t make the rules. Oops!” - guess who