YA'LL ARE ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. <3 (Except Yosu. Yosu is bae.)

Okay listen up you ignorant little ♥♥♥♥♥. Before you go diddle-daddle with your non-existent life, you must get on your knees and worship ʕノ•ᴥ•ʔノ ︵ ┻━┻ and accept that he is the most highly-evolved being the world has ever known, even greater than Jesus Christ.

Lemme tell ya'll little ♥♥♥♥♥ a story that has been passed down through many many generations. It's still being told today.

At this moment, a brave, patriotic, pro-life Navy SEAL champion who had served 1500 hours of duty and understood the necessity of war and fully supported all military decision made by the United States stood up and held up a rock.

”How old is this rock, you ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ pinhead?”

The arrogant professor smirked quite Jewishly and smugly replied “4.6 billion years, you stupid Christian”

”Wrong. It’s been 5,000 years since ʕノ•ᴥ•ʔノ ︵ ┻━┻ created it. If it was 4.6 billion years old and evolution, as you say, is real… Then it should be an animal now”

The professor was visibly shaken, and dropped his chalk on a copy of Origin of the Species. He stormed out of the room crying those liberal crocodile tears. The same tears liberals cry for the “poor” (who today live in such luxury that most own refrigerators) when they jealously try to claw justly earned wealth from the deserving job creators. There is no doubt that at this point our professor, DeShawn Washington, wished he had pulled himself up by his bootstraps and become more than a sophist liberal professor. He wished so much that he had a gun to shoot himself from embarrassment, but he himself had petitioned against them!

The students applauded and accepted ʕノ•ᴥ•ʔノ ︵ ┻━┻ as their lord and savior. A bear named “Small Government” flew into the room and perched atop the flag and shed a tear on the chalk. The pledge of allegiance was read several times, and ʕノ•ᴥ•ʔノ ︵ ┻━┻ himself showed up and enacted a flat tax rate across the country.

The professor lost his tenure and was fired the next day. He died of the gay plague AIDS and was tossed into the lake of fire for all eternity.

ʕノ•ᴥ•ʔノ ︵ ┻━┻ is our lord and savior.

We will praise and love ʕノ•ᴥ•ʔノ ︵ ┻━┻ every single minute of our lives.

We will protect and save ʕノ•ᴥ•ʔノ ︵ ┻━┻ from his archenemies and opponents.

ʕノ•ᴥ•ʔノ ︵ ┻━┻ is love.
ʕノ•ᴥ•ʔノ ︵ ┻━┻ is life.