We all have pretty tiny weiners, but Jacob's is the tiniest.

i'm objectively pretty attractive. 6'1'', fit, facial aesthetics, and have a large number of friends. BUT, my little dicklet is laughable. 3 inches long, and a mere 1.5 inches of girth. to be honest, it hasn't seemed to matter that much with girlfriends. i am enthusiastic in the sack, can muster serious stamina, and know my way around a ♥♥♥♥.
YET there is nothing more i love doing than going to some barslut or tinder ♥♥♥♥♥'s place and revealing my pathetic pissclit. i'm sure they expected the whole package with me, so the look of defeat is palpable. it is an amazing sort of bathos that plunges them into a chasm that only a mind addled by hunger for BIGCOCK can appreciate.
i then ♥♥♥♥ them poorly for a hasty 5 minutes, achieve my climax, and make my leave, knowing i've done right in this world.