i made this group purely impulsively and may post stuff out there just for fun or something serious like if it was my diary

i will write a bit of info out there so u could understand who tf am i (if u even care)

ahem
im an about 18 y.o. he/him, kinda non-binary, bisexual dude who suffers from some sort of mental condition (i have no idea wtf is this and its pretty dangerous to go to a doctor in my country with such symptoms)

had some suicidal thoughts earlier in life (and still have those happen time to time) also did some self harm as a bonus(i hope it wont happen again anymore)

i have some sort of trust issues, cant really look in people's eyes, really shy about many things, scared of loud sounds, dont really like to interact with
random people and maybe something more

i have a beautiful cute and really supportive girlfriend who really helps me with my mental struggles (we really love eachother) i really like to cuddle with her and she, as she said "really touch starved" but cant be with me more often cuz of her conservative parents (they r really religious and think that gay/trans/any other lgbtq+ people r bad)

i live in kinda poor family (its not that bad) my mother helps me alot sometimes and my father... well, he lives with us but i nearly never communicate with him

one of my life goals is to become a somewhat popular streamer so i could do stuff i like but with people gazing at me doing it / socializing with people without much interaction / support others who struggle in life (i cant do it rn cuz my setup is very trash and my internet is slower than carrying data manually)

i really like art of any sort (music, painting, digital art, performance art and such stuff) and often dream about becoming a good painter/musician

i started learning japanese recently and i really like it (im doing pretty good) there is no particular reason behind it, i just like to learn stuff and japanese is pretty similar to language i know (like pronunciations and such)

if u out there wanting to help me somehow or just say some words to me u can dm me or maybe comment my posts and tell me something good (i would love this)