Booty Wolf

There are ♥♥♥♥ bags everywhere. Unfortunately they're hard to tell apart from bags that aren't made of or contain ♥♥♥♥. They may look extremely inviting with floral patterns, glitter, pictures of strawberries on them. So you think to yourself 'my, what a treat. Life has finally gave up poking the bruises it has left upon me and is rewarding me for my stoicism'. You approach the bag with the eagerness of a child at christmas that doesn't have a poor, broken family, like that smelly tramp-child from Willy Wonkas Chocolate Family film starring Gene Wilder. You clutch the edges of the bag with sweaty privileged sausage fingers, fireworks going off inside your brain at all the possibilities and goodies that lie waiting for you to reap. You tear it apart, like a predator at the throat of some poor feeble prey only to be greeted by the great, sour stench of ♥♥♥♥ that clings to your skin and clogs up your pores.