So you want to be a real man? Well you will have to listen and take notes. But you have to take notes by using your man fingers to scratch into stone.

The 3 most manly things:

• Beer
  
• Monstertrucks
  
• Facial hair

I know there might be a lot of 12 years old reading this guide, but not to worry! This guide is all about helping you no matter how old you are.

You will be taken through a journey while reading this guide, a journey that will give you chest hair, make your armpits sweat and make your thirst for a female covered in beer even bigger.

While gaming you have to sit on your throne of beers, to create a nice foundation for your arse which will make your bum more manly. You will need some pictures of females around your setup to make your testosterone more active.

You will also need a very manly beard, not a creepy pedo moustache but a wicked sick beard. Example is given on the picture beneath.

To the left you see the wrong kind of man you want to be while gaming, because his beard sends out the wrong signals, if you are 12 years old it would not do that much damage and I would be impressed if you could grow a beard like that. If you are a girl, I do hope you can not grow both kinds of beards or else you should think about shaving. But to the right side, you see a Chuck Norris styled beard, it's cool and very manly which means your beard will send out an aura ingame that makes your enemys scared of you and your teammates respect you.

You see being a man while gaming can be difficult but you must believe in something that can guide you through De_Dust2. I myself believe in two things, the almighty FireLord and of course my D. You see the harder it is, the better you can play. I remember the time where I beat a Global Elite Team on of course De_Dust2, while I was playing with harmless bots while my rank being Silver One.

After a hard fight, you must reward yourself with listening to the tunes of the spartans, also known as FOR SPARTA!, while masturbating to whatever your D desires.


-Xyr0 the FireLord

Do not worry my less manly friend, when this guide is over you will be as manly as me.
This is one of the times where we can learn a lot from Batman, you should try to learn how to make the Batman voice or Liam Neesons voice because they are as manly as they get. This means that your aim and tactics will improve because your voice sends out vibrations to your brain which makes you think like Batman and Liam Neeson, and they are both what we could call Global Elite in real life.

We are men, we game naked. You should let your penis breath freely, it will work like an wallhack, your penis will point at the enemys direction and you will just have to follow it. You can thank me later for this piece of advice.

If you want to be a 110% man, you will take a shower... Wait, we don't take showers. Our manly smell helps us mark our territory. What I will not recommend, is peeing around your setup to mark your territory. You will discover why if you try, I have been there.

All kind of beards are beautiful, no matter race or colour. Don't be a racist. But more beard = More space to storage your beer and porn magazines.

You will have to scream things into the microphone while gaming, such as "MONSTERTRUCK, BLOOD, SPARTA" to show how much of a man you have become. Your teammates and enemies will respect you for it and might even ask you to become their senpai.

You will not notice them. You will lead them.

Create your own army of men with beards.

And If you can't grow a beard, buy one on eBay where you also bought your wallhack, I mean bracelets and fluffy toys. No one uses wallhack here, we are too masculin for such things.

If you watch Bambi or Titanic it might happen. Because it might cause you to cry which would not be very masculin of you to do. Men do not cry, they have their beards to hold on to in the tough times. Remember, a beard is a mans best friend. Or something like that.

Okaay~

How to eat while gaming - http://gtm.steamproxy.vip/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=242333712
and How to be a gamer girl! - http://gtm.steamproxy.vip/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=287417352

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