Maybe have it expend übercharge on use and just give it some pretty heavy melee damage as well as extra running speed while active. The übercharge would functionally restrict you from going on a rampage, which would balance out with its usefulness when it does work. Or perhaps make it so that alt-fire is self-hit for the speed-boost, while normal fire is regular discharge.

Edit: While all functions expend übercharge, that is. That part should be in regardless, I think.

Stats:
+While Hit A Ragdoll Of Teammate It Resurrects More Faster
+If Is An Arena Revives With 50 HP Left
+Wet Enemyes Gives Crits
-30 Damage
-When The User Is Wet Electroshocks "Lose 3 HP At Second"

Stats: (EDITED)
Positive effects
+crits when target is wet
+removes stun when hitting allies and gains 40% uber
+MOUSE 2 produces alternate melee attack that stuns target for 3 secounds and marks them for death at the cost of 25% uber

Negative effects
-does 25% less damage
-50% lower attack speed
-inflicts critical damage to self if user is wet

The Cardiac Arrest.
Level 0 - 100 Shocking Electronic.

Positive.
------------
25% To Set The Enemy On Fire.
Does Crits On Wet Enemys.
Negative.
------------
Lose 10hp A Second When In Water When The Weapon's Equipped.
-10% Slower Firing Speed.

That seems to have balanced it.

Slot 2.
Deals/heals 35% of remaining/lost hp upon hit.
Overheal is considered as part of the targets hp in both cases.
Uber: Automatically use on self. Can attack when not using on self. Can't swap waepons.

I like the OP's idea. Balanced but does something and it makes sense.

No overheal though.

Originally posted by Joubba:

------------------------------
My idea for the stats:

Bad:
- User takes slightly damage underwater
- User also takes crits when wet

Good:
+ Heal buff teammate by hitting
+ Crits on wet enemies

how about 3 damage/sec underwater, user takes minicrits when wet, recovers 20 HP per hit on teammate, and minicrits wet players? Also, on hit, player being hit takes 2 dmg/sec for 3 sec.
Also, somewhere in the item desc should be: "Shocking... isn't it?"

Okay my stat idea.

-20% damage
-15% range
-20% fire rate
On hit; Causes extra "electric" damage which functions like bleed damage.
Hitting a emeny underwater causes extra damage, like the neon annhilator.

The Cardiac Arest
Charges with uber (Charges faster if healing a fast target)
Does more damage when charged (up to +30%) but quickly depletes with each swing (2 swings and back to no charge)
-50% damage when not charged at all
on hit: Teammates run faster for 3 seconds, Enemies are slowed for 2 seconds
-10% movement speed and health when equiped

"Defib? why do that when you can Refib?"

+ Damage Bonus based on Charge (1% Charge = 1 dmg point)
- On Hit : resets charge

Originally posted by Needutella:

+ Damage Bonus based on Charge (1% Charge = 1 dmg point)
- On Hit : resets charge

Do you mean your uber goes down to 0%? Then who would use it?

20% Chance For Target To Be Stunned for 1 seconds
100% Chance For Target To Be Stunned if wet (stunned For 2 Seconds)
10% Damage
(Dual Weild If Possible)

25% Slower Hiting Time
Uses 5% of The Uber Per Hit
If you have no uber stuns are not possible and you lose 50% damage

Tell Me What You Think :)

I think this idea has potential to go very far, and I think the stats should go as follows.

-25% damage
-50% range (you have to be point blank to hit someone)
Take in crits while wet

Hitting teammates while under stun effects should be unstunned. Stunning enemies slow them down by 10% as well as inflicting a shock effect (same a bleeding but with different animation). Deals 50% more damage to enemies who are wet. By using uber, you can temporarily stun enemies, and uber only drains while melee is being held (so as soon as you switch to primary or medi gun, uber stops draining)

I really hope valve ends up adding this weapon, and would be so cool if the stats could go something like this. Guess we'll have to wait and see!

all hits u take are crits if u are wet
-20 fireing speed
all hits on wet players (of any kind like milk jarate and water) are crits
on tautkill (a non frendly player) u kill him (duh) , on tautkill to a frendly player he regens all his helth in 5 sec , taunt is 5 sec long
seys "charging!"

minicrits when hit someone in water, sets them on fire if they are covered in jarete or madmilk ect

-10 health on warer
no random critical hits