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+On hit: 100% Critical Strike Chance for 99999 seconds
+9001% Damage Bonus
+99999% Firing Speed
+On Kill: Become Ubered for 5 minutes
+100% chance to cause Critical Hits for 9001 seconds after being deployed
+Crits on Headshot
+Crits on Bodyshot
+Crits stack, for every time it should crit the damage is increased while still critting.
+10000 hp on Wearer
+On hit: 5000 hp restored
+Overheal fills up twice normal amount (Normal Medi Gun gives 20000 hp, quick fix gives 15000)
+500 hp regenerated per second on user
+Upon 3 kills you can go into Overload Mode for 5 minutes, which gives double damage, +5000 bullets in clip, 60000 bullets extra, bullets traveling as fast as a sniper rifle, and a free copy of episode 3
-no random critical hits
Back to gameplay: The exchange you'd be making over stock is diminished effective range for potentially increased accuracy in close and mid-range. I don't see the need for any stat points beyond those two points--
...But wait! This is *perfect*. We're done here; lock thread.