You play elite dangerous for an average of 100 hours, just enough to get you familiar with controls, likely you wanted a 'conda as fast as possible which you now have thanks to watching youtube videos like "how to earn money in elite dangerous the fastest way.". now you are looking at the federal corvette. and are watching "how to rank up in the federal navy."

"♥♥♥♥♥♥♥, i grinded so much for the anaconda, now i have it, but got shot to bits... luckily i saved my anus because i combat logged to save my money! i'm such a genius."

You're doing well.

Didn't Fdev announced a CQC tournament? they did, didn't they? omg, i never play cqc but that makes me so furious!

Damn, i got banned from the steam community because i was ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ so hard on the game being a grind and calling whole of Fdev lying wussies... let's open up photoshop and create some message where i claim they banned me from the game. that'll sure cause a ripple effect to the community.

1. go to the store and type in elite dangerous
2. scroll down to the reviews
3. click show negative only (or just scroll down through recent ones)
4. click on several negative reviews and conclude that 99.99% of the reviews are pretty much the same. So why not follow them? getting likes makes me so happy anyway!
5. conclude you can't just copy said negative review
6. cram out all the most ♥♥♥♥♥♥ excuses about the game like:

-it's a grind
-it's too easy
-waste of my time (but don't tell you have +100 hours, that's not done.)
-Fdev don't care about the gamers (don't tell about support, wouldn't wish to let actual people meet them and just buy the game because of their excellent support! Also don't tell about they actually listen to their players but rarely on steam. certainly don't apply logic by saying you should go to their forums or reddit instead of posting to some vaguely legit facebook page to tell your opinions.)
-Fdev lies to everyone
-Tell some ♥♥♥♥ about horizons being a standalone game, which they changed to a season pass. just follow the hive mind: "they did it to errase all negativity", don't however apply logic by saying "they removed it from steam and made it a season pass because that is way more convenient, the way they publish expansions suits the title of 'expansion pass' better." nope, you are in the mindless zombie squad now, logic has no meaning here.
-whining about horizons having no content (eventhough it's a work in progress, but since your incompetence to read you couldn't know.) eventhough this review is about the base game.

7. sum all of that up in one big rant.
8. jerk off to the amount of people liking your list of lies and assumptions.

that's right, it doesn't stop with your review.
there are real people out there, people with an actual good opinion. this kind needs to be erradicated from existance! FOR THE HIVE MIND!

just look up every positve review and express your hate by downvoting it.
"do i have to read the review?"
no silly! what would that mean? not like you should be voting for the actual review being good or bad! no.... voting on reviews isn't about that, it's about who likes the game versus who doesn't. (don't look in the tiny information window of the game, our scientists haven't figured out yet what "overall rating" means.)

Just in case you don't know, i fully support the game, i love the devs. I'm writing this 'guide' to wake people up a bit.

I'd like to say my thanks to everybody making me wonder why the hell elite dangerous gets a mixed review. If you just looked up more details on what you're about to buy, a space sandbox simulator remake of the 1984's elite. If you read their kickstarter correctly you'll notice they only didn't do 1 thing yet: publishing the art book.

Oh and please cut the ♥♥♥♥ with "oh thank god for your review, i almost bought the game." what? you didn't bought the game because of steam reviews?

There are negative reviews out there with actual good points which i upvoted in the past because the review itself was good. that's what people need to understand, you give a thumbs up for the REVIEW being good NOT about the GAME being good. if you want to express your opinion with the least amount of energy, then write a review saying "i dislike it" saves a lot of time and effort! saying they don't listen, they are lying ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ or whatever can be read in almost every negative review on steam.



Thanks for reading.