Counter-Strike: Source

Counter-Strike: Source

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How to not get your genital appendage stuck in toaster
By Zombie Man
This guide is purely made for my friend Texx who recently tried to say Kappa123 in the mirror. This was in order to summon the rare pepe's. However, because of unclear instructions he got his genital appendage stuck inside a toaster. This is nothing to be ashamed of, considering the instructions did not specify whether or not the penis should be involved in the Kappa123 Pepe summoning guide.

Now to the guide itself.

Its pretty simple to not get your ♥♥♥♥ stuck in a toaster.
First off you want to make sure that the toaster stays in the kitchen ONLY. This alone will decrease the chance off genital appendages getting obstructed inside the device. Studies show that leaving your toaster in the kitchen ONLY reduces the chance of Kappa123 failure by 66%!!! This is by far my most useful tip.

It can also be useful to wear jeans or other kinds of pants that are difficult to take off when compared to shorts or sweatpants. If you want to be creative you can add a belt to your shorts/sweatspants to make it harder to take them off, since this will result in your genital appendage being safe from toaster obstruction. Experiments on what kind of belt that should be used shows an unclear result, however scientists recomend the one your dad used to beat you as a kid.

Now to the third and MOST IMPORTANT STEP.
In order to succesfully succeed in anything in life... you need...
Lennies ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Lots of lennies ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


…………………….…………...„--~ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°).'\
………….…………………… („-~~-„¸_….,/ì'Ì
…….…………………….¸„-^"¯( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ¸-¯"¯/'
……………………¸„„-^"¯ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡'\¸„„,-"
**¯¯¯'^^~-„„„----~^*'"¯ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡¸-"
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)„-^" : ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡„-"
:gr8 d1kk m8, I r8 8/8( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° „
( ͡° ͜ʖ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ¸„„-^¯
:.' : : '\ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)¸„„-~"
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°):"-„""***/*'ì¸'¯
:.':( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡:"-„ ( ͡° ͜ʖ\
.( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° \,
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ 'Ì
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ/
"-„_::::_„-*__„„~"
   
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4 Comments
Mini 15 Mar, 2017 @ 7:01am 
Instructions were unclear.
dick stuck in washing machine.
honkchonk 13 Mar, 2017 @ 10:35am 
I am afriad I am seeing this in 2017 and i am a year too late. My genital appendage has already being taken by the toaster multiple times, but now I have come across this fantastic guide at last I can now successfuly summon the rare pepe's without having to worry. Truly you are the real mvp.
turbotard 5 Mar, 2016 @ 9:49am 
10/10
Attila La Dank 4 Mar, 2016 @ 5:14pm 
Thank god this was here I almost lost mine