DARK SOULS™: Prepare To Die Edition

DARK SOULS™: Prepare To Die Edition

423 ratings
'OW TO BE AN ORK
By WARBOSS KRUMP
DA BEST GUIDE ON BEIN AN ORK.
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'ERE WE GO!
SO SOME O' DA BOYZ WOZ TELLIN ME YOU 'UMIES WANTZ TO BE IN ME WAAAAGH..... HAHAAHAHAHA!

LIKE DAT KUD 'APPEN AS LONG AS I IZ GREEN 'N SMASHY

IN ORDER FOR ANYONE TO BE IN MY WAAAAAGH YOU'Z GOTZ TO BE A BIG 'N GREEN ORK WIV A BIG CHOPPA 'N A SMASHY SMASHA.

SO LETZ GET STARTED
'OW TO LOOK LIKE AN ORK
'EREZ WOT YOU GROTZ SHOULD TRY N' LOOK LIKE



BUT YOU GROTZ KAN NEVA BE BIGGA THAN ME CUZ I'Z DA BIG BOSS

SO I'LL SHOW YOU'Z ANOTHER ONE O DA BOYZ YOU KAN USE TO SEE IF YOU'Z BIG 'N GREEN ENUFF.



YOU GOTZ TO 'AVE A BIG JAW, RED EYES (DA RED ONES GO FASTA)

UZ ORKZ 'AVE LITTLE EYES CUZ WE IZ MEGA FOKUSSED ON KRUMPIN 'N KILLIN

OH AN OBVIOUSLY YA NEED DA 'UGE BODY FOR EXTRA KRUMPIN



DA CHOPPAZ 'N SMASHAZ
NOW, WE GOTZ TA TALK ABOUT DA CHOPPAS 'N ALL DAT GOOD STUFF, KUZ DEY IZ DA MOST IMPORTANT FER KRUMPIN WEAK FAIRY BOYZ.

MAKE SURE TA GET YERSELF ONE O' DEEZ 'ITTAS TA 'IT WIV.

-SNAKEBOY CHOPPA



GOOD FER CHOPPIN UP LIL TWIGGY 'UMIES, FAST AS 'ELL. I FINK IT'S A BIT REDDA

-DEMON GREAT CHOPPA



DISS BIG LAD, MEGA CHOPPIN FER DA BIGGA LADZ TO KILL EM KWIKK

-GOLEM CHOPPA



DIS IS A SPESHUL CHOPPA. WIV DA ABILITY TO CHANNEL YER WAAAAGH POWERZ INTO RANGED CHOPPY STUFF

-GREAT CHOPPA



BIG, SLOW, 'N CHOPPY WOT ELSE 'AS I GOTZ TO SAY

-DEMON GREATAX



DIS 'UGE BEAST LOOKS MORE LIKE A SMASHA TA ME, SO GOOD AT KRUMPIN YOU KAN LAUNCH DA LIL TWIGZ IN DA SKY

-DRAGON KING CHOPPA



ANOVA WAAAAGH WEPPUN. DA SHOKKA BLAST IZ PRETTY KRUMPY

-BLAKKSMIFF GIANT SMASHA



DIS GIANT SED 'E WOZ WELL BIG. I KRUMPED 'IM DEN LOOTED IZ SHOKKA SMASHA. GUD FER THE TURTLEY 'UMIES

-GREAT SMASHA



FOUND DIS STICK IN A SWAMP, PRETTY GUD AT KRUMPIN THE PARRY SPAMMIN 'UMIES.

-DEMON GREAT SMASHA



LIKE DA GREAT SMASHA, BUT LOOKS BETTA

-LARGE SMASHA



DIS SMASHA STINKS A LIL BIT. MIGHT EVEN MAKE 'UMIES STINK TO DEFF.

-DRAGON TOOFF



NOT VERY SMASHY, I DON'T LIKE IT TOO MUCH. BESIDES SOME 'UMIE DRESSED IN ROKKS WAS USIN IT.

-SMOUGHS SMASHA



FOR A SMASHA AS BIG AZ DISS IT DON'T EVEN 'IT DAT 'ARD, WOZ WELL ANGRY.

-STONE GREAT CHOPPA



GOT A NICE 'IT FOR KRUMPIN DEM 'UMIES INTO DA FLOOR WIV.
DA SHOOTAZ
NOT MUCH TA THIS ONE.

ONLY SHOOTAZ ALLOWED IZ DA DRAGONBUSTA SHOOTAZ OR DA KUSTOM SNAZZBOW KUZ ITZ GOT SOME GUD DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA..

DA MAJIKK
NOW SOME O YOU MIGHT BE WEIRDBOYZ....

YOUZ IZ GONNA NEED TA CHANNEL YER WAAAAGH PROPERLY.

DA BOSS 'AZ GOT YA COVERED.

FIRST OFF, BLAKK MAJIKK ONLY, NONE O DAT FANCY FAIRY BOY MAJIKK








SECOND, DA MAJIKK STIKKZ ALLOWED ARE DA MANUS STIKK OR DA DEMON STIKK




DATS IT FER DA MAJIKK
BURNA BOYZ
NOW SOME O' YOU BOYZ MIGHT WANNA UZE DA BURNA.



ALL BURNAZ IZ ALLOWED CEPT DA WEAK ONEZ.. WOT DO WE LOOK LIKE, UMIEZ?!!?!

HA! NOW GET BURNIN BOYZ.
'OW TO KRUMP WEAK 'UMIES
'IT EM 'ARD

SHOOT EM 'ARD

BURN EM 'ARD

'N LAFF WHEN DEY IZ DED KUZ OF 'OW WEAK DEY IZ.
DA KONKLUSION
NOW YOU KAN BE A GUD ORK. IF YOU IZ GUD ENUFF THEN MAYBE YOU KAN JOIN ME WAAAAAGH.

OFF TA GO KRUMP 'UMIEZ NOW BYE

IF ANY O YOUZ 'AZ KWESTIONS DEN ASK DA BOSS WOT TO DO.
74 Comments
Goldenkitten 2 Aug @ 8:02pm 
Fuck it, take my points. I know it likely took 15-minutes to put together but I laughed.
Knight Silver 5 Jun @ 11:35am 
WAGHHAMMAH
Nimbus_09 22 Jun, 2023 @ 2:41pm 
Shadow of Mordor?
__7__ 30 Nov, 2022 @ 10:37pm 
such dedication...
MibuX 15 Sep, 2022 @ 3:46am 
tysm
Highlord 18 Apr, 2022 @ 7:00am 
By the Emperor they've invaded this planet as well...Get the flamer!

NO

THE HEAVY FLAMER
PebbleSmasher 16 Apr, 2022 @ 5:22pm 
ERE'S TO DA BOSS, WAAAAAAAAAAAGH
Charlemagniac 6 Feb, 2022 @ 12:28pm 
GOOD GUIDE BOSS
Grimnir 23 Dec, 2021 @ 3:35pm 
MORE DAKKA!
Holding These Alligators Down 6 Nov, 2021 @ 1:39am 
KILL THE OOMANS!!!!