1.Suicide by jumping off a silo, then respawning nearby and making a stone knife to cut your own meat, eat it then die again of food poisoning.
2. Closing a door on yourself then getting flung acroos the room and dying
3.Shoot a gun then desync if front of the bullet so it hits you and you die
4. Getting out of a truck while it is rolling down a hill and die
5. Throw a fireaxe only to have it spawn behind you still flying and hit you in the back and die
6.Unpinning a grenade and forgetting how to throw it
7.Fall of of the fire station roof whilst bambi hunting in elektro
8.Accidentaly drinking disinfectant by pressing the wrong action menu button
9.To swing a fireaxe and get desynced right in front of the strike thus killing you
10.Putting a burlap sack on your head for laughs but starve to death becuase it became a permanent fixture due to glitch, being unable to see any food.
11.Sacrificing yourself in front of the memorial in Severograd to atone for all of the KoS you've done
12.Pressing F11 not knowing what it does then left click
13.Trying to push your friend off a roof but miss and fall off instead
14.Drink disinfectant and climb green mountain radio tower, standing on the top with your arms outstretched singing "Kumbaya my lord" while the banana gods claim your soul
15.Mass suicide with 10 other bambis by jumping off of the novo clock tower

1. Mistaking you for that zombie running up the road and shooting you
2. Constantly press the wrong action menu button trying to bandage you, you bleed out shortly after.
3.Goes to blow up a gas station while failing to warn you, who is sitting at the pumps filling a jerrycan
4.Takes all of the food, not giving a single bite to you, causing you to starve
5.Pushing you off a fire station roof while you were trying to take out hostiles
6."accidentaly" throw a fireaxe at your face
7.Driving a truck into a tree, when you get out you die, but somehow he got out just fine.
8.Getting shot in the face while drinking from a pump ( i did that one, revenge for all the other times)
9.Running you over in a truck because apparently a guy wearing a ghillie suit looks like a zombie
10.Hitting you in the face with a sledgehammer while you were logging out
11.Poisoning that kiwi you are about to pick up and eat
12.Killing you because your character looks asian
13."Dueling" you with a longhorn when you had no idea this was a thing
14.Giving you a water bottle that "accidentaly" got filled with alchohol tincture
15.Outright murders you with a fireaxe
16. Ties you up while you're afk and you get disconnected from the game

1. Lag off a roof and die
2.Begin desyncing while in a major firefight
3. Get disconnected in the middle of the street while in a firefight
4.Lag while driving a truck, causing you to crash and die
5.Desync in front of a guy driving a truck, while standing still
6.Get murdered by a fresh spawn with a hoe while desyncing
7.In a firefight without a weapon, see a gun and ammo but can't pick it up because of desync
8.Desync into that horde of zombie that just killed your friend
9.Drop your backpack filled with ammo to pick up another better one, but cant take the ammo back up from desync, firefight erupts moments later while you have an empty weapon.
10.Desyncing underneath the world and falling to your death

1. Get teleported 20 kilometers in the sky and fall to your death
2. Have 50 live grenades spawned around you...figure out how that ends
3.Have that gas station you're right beside remotely detonated
4.A hacker spawns a truck above you that fall on you
5.Get kiled by a hacker teleporting his bullet inside buildings
6.Raped by a hacker using an automatic no recoil mosin with infinite ammo
7.Get axe butchered by a speedhacker
8.A hacker throws 100 axes at you, murdering your face with a storm of axes
9.Teleporting his trock on top of you
10.Just being an asshat using hacks to kill you
11. Purge hacks, i.e. killing all on the server instantly
12.Hacks the server so there's no food causing you to starve
13.Spawns 50 zombies in a circle around you
14.Simulate 50 axe swings in your face
15.Long range hacked shotgun kill from 500 meters

1.Step on a landmine that some guy left in the middle of the woods to clear inventory space
2.Have a truck load in on a hill and roll down and kill you
3.A sniper misses a shot that accidentally hits you
4.You approach a random fireplace in the middle of the woods that has a can of spray paint and shotgun ammo inside
5. Logging off on a mountain, an update occurs where the devs remove this mountain, next time you log in you fall to death because the mountain wasn't there
6. You know that PET bottle you just drank? Some ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ filled that with gasoline.
7. While we're at it, that fruit you just ate had disinfectant spray on it.

1: Accidentally shot friend twice with an MP5-K, proceeded to administer saline. Legs broke and 2 shot by a zombie soon after. RIP Cecil
2: Unpinned and threw grenade at a gas station, friend didn't hear me say back away, explosion killed him. RIP James
3. Friend shot near me with a shogun, got salty and kille dhim with an AK74. RIP cecil again\\
4. Me, misclicked while in F11. Free AKM at prison island for anyone who finds it.

1: Run into a low hanging tree limb, ruined helmet+unconscious
2. Breaks legs on 2 inch pebble, game glitches and you can't make a splint
3. Cut down tree, tree falls on you, dies
4. Trips on grass and breaks neck
5. Impaled by a bush
6. Shuts gate on yourself, snaps a major artery
7. Crawling under concrete fence at NWAF, fence falls on you, dies
8. Swallow air and get chemical poisoning
9. Steps on tiny glass piece, bleeds out
10. Eats 5 cans of peaches and starves to death 2 minutes later


PS: This section is a joke, unless your game bugs out severely, none of these ways can kill you.

This is a pretty low quality guide, i understand...but if at least one person looks at this and thinks "huh i've been there before" i'll be happy as can be.
If anyone has suggestions or content you want to see, leave a comment.
New update adds sections 6 and 7, and a minor update to section 5.